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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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5 years of SH this month. - November 3rd 2013, 03:16 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

So, this month is 5 years since I started self-harming. I don't know why I'm writing this really. I guess I'm just disappointed. I wanted to quit before I got to the 5 year mark just so I couldn't say it's been this long, but I've been so stressed lately. I'm almost a year behind in schoolwork and I just found out I'm moving before the end of the year, and am gonna be going back to public school. Great. I finally got away from that place and now I'm going back, and even worse, I'm gonna be at a new school. And I have to move away from my best friend. I'm not even worried about that for myself, but for him. I'm freaking out honestly. So back on topic, I guess I still want to quit but I feel like I've tried everything and it's just really discouraging. If anyone has any ideas, I'd be willing to try pretty much anything right now. So, I guess that's all really..

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Re: 5 years of SH this month. - November 3rd 2013, 05:41 PM

Hey there,

It is a good thing that you at least want to quit self harming! You're right that reaching five years can be discouraging, but it doesn't mean that all hope is lost with you.

Is there any way you can get help on getting caught up with your schoolwork? For instance, you can speak to the teachers in those classes and set up dates where you stay after school, go before school, or go during a study hall, in order to get help and at least start getting caught up instead of getting too far behind.

Maybe your new school will be better than your old one as well. In order to make friends and meet new people, consider joining clubs, sports teams, and other social groups, so you can meet people with common interests, which may make it easier on you. Not everyone is bad.

As far as your best friend, maybe you can speak to him about your concerns and see what he says. You can also make sure you have ways to keep in touch with him, whether it's phone or Skype calls, email, text messages, or letters. Then, during vacations maybe the two of you can arrange to meet up, depending on how far away you are moving.

Have you ever considered speaking to someone about the self harm? I know that this is scary, but in the end, you really do deserve a support system. They can give you ideas you never would have thought of before, help you cope, and help you solve your problems. They can also just be someone there to help you get things off your chest. Talk to a friend or family member, teacher, club or sports team adviser, guidance counselor, school nurse, religious leader, doctor, or therapist, for instance. Your voice deserves to be heard and there will always be someone willing to help.

Have you ever looked at this list of alternatives to self harm? These are healthier, safer ways to cope. I find ones that involve self expression like writing, art, or music the best, but you may find something else to be more helpful. You can remind yourself of all of the reasons you shouldn't be self harming as well, like the disappointment you are feeling, or because when you self harm, you have to hide it from those you don't want knowing and the risk of infection.

Even though things are a bit discouraging now, I know that you can get through this and come out on top. Keep your head held high, stay strong, and keep fighting. You can do this!


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