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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Name: Kayla
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Location: Minnesota

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Join Date: February 8th 2013

scared - November 4th 2013, 06:43 AM

Ugh. So my grandma had a heart attack a few months ago and that set me off and I relapsed then when she git out of the hospital I stopped but now tomorrow she's haveing surgery and I'm freaking out. Not only because she's older but because she keeps talking about how she isn't going to make it and all this carp and she even went and paid for her funeral. Also she has been saying for years now that she's ready to die. So now I'm all anxious and hateing panic attacks and I really thinking going to relapse but I don't want to. But i feel like that's the only way I'll stay sane. Help!

sometimes you gotta fall before you fly.
I believe that we all fall down sometimes
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Re: scared - November 4th 2013, 07:39 AM

Hey Kayla,

I think the best thing that you can do right now is try and remain positive until you have a reason not to, as petit as that sounds, that's the start to recovering your body to it's calm and collected self.

As for relapsing, if it happens - it happens. It's a part of getting through self harm, and everyone struggles. As much as you want to stop for your Grandma, the process isn't that easy unfortunately, just try and think positively or see the alternatives to self-harm on TH, unfortunately I can't yet post a link to that...

I hope all goes well.

Much regards,
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Re: scared - November 4th 2013, 11:31 AM

Hi there,

I agree with Jack about trying to remain positive and you know for sure what is going to happen. Try and stay motivated and remind yourself that anything can happen in that surgery, not necessarily bad. In the meantime, maybe you can try and speak to your grandma before the surgery if you have time and just let her know you are on her side and that you care about her, it will mean a lot to her.

Remember that your family is going through the thing as you right now. None of you deserve to go through this alone. Maybe you can approach some of your other family members, whether it's a parent, sibling, aunt or uncle, cousin, or someone else that knows your grandma. The both of you can talk things out together, which will help not only you, but the person you are speaking with as well.

Try and find ways to get out your emotions in better ways, so they aren't all pent up inside. Maybe you can do a piece of writing, art, or music about the situation. The self expression you do doesn't have to be good. What it accomplishes is basically getting everything out in a creative way. Exercise is also a great way to release stress. Again, it doesn't have to be anything extreme, it just helps get things out.

This is a list of alternatives to self harm. Maybe you can try some of the ones on here that you haven't before, one will work for you.

I'm so sorry to hear about what you are going through right now, but I know that you can get through this!


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