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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Exclamation how do i tell my mom? - November 5th 2013, 09:39 PM

I want to tell my mom that I cut but im scared I already know how she will react because last year I told my best friend (who cuts) that I cut ad she told the school consuler and my mom cried and blamed herself but I know I need help im just too scared to get it please help

Last edited by Hypothesis.; November 5th 2013 at 10:31 PM. Reason: Removing triggering prefix.
   
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Re: how do i tell my mom? - November 5th 2013, 10:35 PM

Hey there,

First of all, it is excellent that you want to tell your mother!

One route you can go down is having the guidance counselor speak with your mom, and you can join her. You can let your guidance counselor know how your mother reacted last time. Maybe you and your guidance counselor can come up with ways to tell her and explain a bit more about self harm and what it is. You can come up with ways to explain to her why you self harm and reassure her that she is NOT to blame, you just want support.

You can tell her verbally as well. If you want, you can bring a friend with you for added support, but you don't have to. Print out pamphlets or borrow books on self harm to explain things a bit better to her, and maybe plan out what you're going to say before you go in there so you know how things are going to do. It may help to sit her down on a day when she's in a relatively good mood. Try and explain things to the best of your ability so she doesn't blame herself this time. It may require going into why you self harm or how long you've been doing it, or what triggers you.

Another option is writing her a letter. In the letter, explain everything you feel as if she should know, and emphasize that you understand she is worried, but she is not to blame and you really just want her to help you through this. Anticipate any questions or concerns she may have and answer them, and get as detailed as necessary. Then deliver it.

I think that even though you are scared you definitely should tell her. Maybe if you explain things more fully than before, she'll be less likely to blame herself?

You can do it!

-Dez


   
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Re: how do i tell my mom? - November 6th 2013, 12:15 PM

I agree with Dez, she has some excellent advice. I just wanted to tell you that you are very strong and couragous for wanting to tell your mom and quit self-harming. I admire your strength <3 Just as Dez said, you can do it!


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Re: how do i tell my mom? - November 6th 2013, 03:16 PM

Firstly, I envy you for finding the courage to tell your mother!

I too agree with Dez, it's best to either have a counselor or a friend with you so that you feel more confident when telling her, this way you can have some mental support when you finally decide you're actually going to tell her.

Choosing a counselor can also give your mother some instant relief as she can speak to someone who can give her advice on what to do, as well as arranging meetings in which you can discuss how you're feeling either with just the counselor or with your mother as well.

Best of luck, you can do this!
~Jack.


PM/VM Me if you need any sort of help, I welcome ANYONE who wants to talk.



"In case you didn't know, dead people don't bleed. If you can bleed, see it, feel it, then you know you're alive. It's irrefutable, undeniable proof. Sometimes I just need a little reminder.
   
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