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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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30 day goal FAILURE - January 10th 2014, 10:11 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I'm done
I can't do it
My Mom just has the Biggest yelling at me I started crying but I was poorly trying to hide it and she just kept yelling. And I feel like I wanna bawl my eyes out right now and i'd text my friends to help me but she took my phone.
I can't do it
I'm SO fucking triggered right now
I wanna take my knife and just rip my arms up
I've never seriously considered doing it in the middle of the day but my mom's going to sleep and I truly think that i'm going to
I've never been so triggered and willing to cut

usually i'm scared to do it when I cut but right now I could do it eagerly

I'm Just so upset i'm close to tears
I'm shaking and I feel so fragile even when I pick things up I do it so gingerly I feel like i'm gonna break my hand doing it.

Why does she have to fucking push me so much
I have done so much work and so much more than other kids my age and i'm still told i'm not good enough and I just wanna scream and cry and break something and explode but I can't do any of those things so I think i'll just sit here and bottle it up

I hate this
I hate ME
I really do just hate my life
sometimes I seriously consider leaving my house and going somewhere
not permanently but I just can't stand to be with her when she's a bitch like this and makes me feel so fucked up inside and makes me feel like shit and I can't do it

I'm gonna break my 30 day goal
sorry Jenna

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PM me anytime!

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Re: 30 day goal FAILURE - January 11th 2014, 12:07 AM

Hey there,

I am sorry you are struggling but hang in there; you can make it through this. I know you are going through a tough time but remember that this will pass. It can be really tough when you have an argument with your parents but remember the things your mom has said don't mean you are not good enough.

Do you think that you can try the Alternatives to Self Harm to try and work through the urges you are having?

I really hope that this helped and if you need anything please feel free to message me.

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Chin up, buttercup.
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Re: 30 day goal FAILURE - January 11th 2014, 12:28 AM


You may hate you. But I certainly don't!
I'm proud that you set a 30 day goal. That right there shows how strong you are and how willing you are to get through this.
I know that right now it seems hopeless, that you're a failure, that things will never get better. But they will. With time, everything can heal.

The alternatives thread would be something to check out, at least until the urge passes. Keep talking with us here at TH, or feel free to PM me and we can talk until you feel better.
You can do this, okay? I believe in you.
Chin up, buttercup.

I love you to the moon and back.

Darling you are the only exception. ~Paramore ♡
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Re: 30 day goal FAILURE - January 13th 2014, 10:02 PM

I'm really sorry about your mum Jason, some mum's can be like that and their shouting, they don't realise how triggering or how bad their shouting can make us feel. Shouting doesn't solve any problems, it only creates them. I think you did so well to set yourself a 30 day goal, you've worked really hard towards it and I think you can do it again! If 30 is too much for you, it's not a failure to set yourself a lower one, baby steps, not mammoth steps. Little steps at a time are those that are the best achieving ones.

Life is for living, not for losing.
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