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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Question How to tell my friend from 6th grade I self injure? - January 20th 2014, 07:22 PM

I'm a sophomore in high school. I moved after 6th grade so I haven't seen any of my friends since then. I recently got back in touch with my best friend and I want to tell her I self injure. She has no idea what I'm like now since we haven't seen each other in years. So how do I tell her? And I'm going to tell her through text...
   
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Re: How to tell my friend from 6th grade I self injure? - January 20th 2014, 07:34 PM

It sounds great that you've gotten in touch with your old friends! socialization is always good for when you feel depressed. Since you haven't spoken to her in a while and you two don't know what the other is like, I think you should ease into it. You could build a little trust, and even ask her if she has suffered from depression or anything else. You could probably start with smaller things and build up to your self-harm. If you'd like to tell her by text, that is fine. Just make sure you have considered all of your other options carefully. Saying something like, "I've been struggling with.." or, "I have something to tell you, and it's going to be hard for you to take in, but.." might help you ease into it.

Also, I am going to link the SH Alternatives Thread so when you feel the need to harm yourself, you can check this out. Keep trying alternatives until you find some that work for you!


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Re: How to tell my friend from 6th grade I self injure? - January 20th 2014, 09:10 PM

I, like you're planning to, told one of my best friends about my self injury via text. I found that it was best to just let it all spill out. Start similarly to how the previous poster mentioned, and also think about including some information on what self harm actually is. Explain a little bit about why you do/did it, etc. Sometimes it comes as a real shock to people and they don't understand why or where or how or what it even is. It can help ease the shock and upset if you teach them a little bit about it, if you will.
Good luck telling your friend! Know that self harm isn't the answer. It's just going to make things worse. Check out the alternatives thread. I know you can get through this. Stay strong!


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Re: How to tell my friend from 6th grade I self injure? - January 20th 2014, 09:27 PM

Hey there,

I think that it is good that you are going to tell your friend about this! Your friend can definitely be a good support for you.

Telling her through something like text is okay, but I agree that it may be useful for you to give her a bit of information about what it means to self harm and why people self harm, so she at least has a better understanding of what you are going through.

Besides that, let her know that you feel as if you can trust her with the information you are about to give her, and let her know that you have been struggling with self harm lately. If you feel comfortable with it, let her know a bit about why you self harm and how she can be a support to you (if that is what you want).

I think it may also help to let her know she can ask questions if she has any, because it may be possible she will need to ask some in order to better understand what you are going through.

Best of luck!

-Dez


   
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