Triggering (SH): Self Harm NOW! :'(

[Beautiful_Mess]

I just got off the phone with my fiance, He's really depressed and he's very sick
And only people who have been talking to me about what's going may understand what I'm talking about.

Anywayz, I'm literally fixin' to cut. I'm depressed and very emotional. I thought when my fiance would call it would help, jus made it a lil worse instead. Knowing that he's as depressed as I am..Makes it worse for me...So I guess I'll jus cut for the both of us(He use to be a cutter)
I have a HUGE need to cut, like right NOW.
I use to take walks..But me and my fiance noticed taking walks jus makes things way worse..I don't know what to do..My mother is too stressed to talk to me right now..and I have no one else to turn to. I cannot talk to my fiance(Cuz like i said only people who've been tallking to me will know why)
I don't wanna cut, but it seems no matter where I turn everything is getting screwed up somehow. I jus wanna be happy, and not depressed. But that's only gonna happen when my fiance is home..I don't get why MY life is the one going to shit..I mean I KNOW I'm jus going thru a rough patch...and I KNOW it'll get better..But I don't know...I'm still leaning toward cutting.

[hocus pocus]

Hey.

You said that you don't actually want to cut, and that is enough reason to not give in. Posting this thread and reaching out tells us that you want help and that you're strong. How about trying new alternative from the alternatives thread? Or going into chat to keep distracted? Also, feel free to PM/VM me if you want to talk it out.

[Beautiful_Mess]

alright...

[Catharsis.]

Hi, Beth.

I agree with Cassie, completely. You've shown, by posting this thread and reaching out, that you're strong enough to look for help and that you don't have to give in. You're really strong, and you can get through this rough patch. I agree that trying a new alternative might help, just to distract you. Or anything that you enjoy doing. Try to keep occupied, as much as you can.

I'm always here if you want to PM/VM me, too. Hang in there!

Gareth

[Ennui.]

Hey there,

Maybe one thing you can do is put reasons to recover near your self harm tool. Basically, any reason you have for not self harming, write it down. It could be that you know that self harm doesn't really help but instead makes things more complicated in the end, that you don't want the scars, or that you're worth a lot more than self harm. The reasons you list can be big or small, but write down any you have. Also write down encouraging quotes and pictures. If you leave this list with your self harm tool, you'll see reasons to recover before picking up the tool, and it may give you more of a motivation to put it down and use an alternative instead.

I agree with the previous posters about finding a new alternative as well. It is great that you have tried some such as walking in the past, but remember that sometimes it takes a bit of trial and error to find the alternative that wroks best for you. That list has a lot to try, so it's okay if you need to experiment with a few to find one that works, all that matters is that you're trying to use them!

Remember that even though self harm may seem tempting, it's not worth it. I can tell you are much stronger than this and can get out on top.

-Dez

[Beautiful_Mess]

Thank you guyz and OH yeah, Happy Valentines