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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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I want to do it... - March 24th 2014, 07:48 PM

I want to self harm. I'm working on trying to get the urge to pass.

My hallucinations are bad and they're scaring me to death. I haven't been able to sleep from them and I'm always second guessing myself.

I am currently on medicine for them - one shot a month of Abilify, as well as for my manic episodes and I've been on this medicine for five months now so it's not causing them.

I want to self harm to get rid of the hallucinations, as it worked once before - it helped ground me and gave me my mental wellbeing back. I don't know how else to do it


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Re: I want to do it... - March 24th 2014, 11:59 PM

Hey Maddie,
I'm sorry you are going through a hard time right now. I know that it seems like cutting is the answer but it isn't. I would suggest trying one of these alternatives to make the urges go away. You say that cutting has made your hallucinations go away before and I know you want them to go away but there are better things to do besides cut. Have you tried talking to someone about the hallucinations when they are happening maybe that could help.

I think if you are still having hallucinations then maybe the medication you are on isn't working and you might want to talk to your doctor to see if they can up the dosage or get you on another pill.

If you ever need to talk I am always here you can PM/VM me anytime.


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Re: I want to do it... - March 25th 2014, 12:59 AM

Hi Maddie,

It sounds like things are really tough right now and I think it's totally understandable that you're feeling the need to self harm. When you're experiencing negative emotions and self harm seems like the only helpful way to cope with them it's really difficult to abstain from injuring yourself. I think the fact that you're managing to stay away from self harm when it seems like the only thing that can help you makes you a really strong person. I know all the difficulties you're struggling with right now probably make you feel like the farthest thing from strong, but having the strength to fight your urges, even if it's just for a little while, proves otherwise.

Self harm may seem like your only option right now but there could be a lot of helpful alternatives out there that you haven't discovered yet. I don't know if you've been linked to it before, but here's a list that might help you. Maybe pick a few alternatives from it that you think might help and try them out next time you're feeling the need to hurt yourself. Obviously not all of them are going to be helpful for everyone, but I think you could manage to find at least a few that work for you. It's easy to believe that hurting yourself is the only solution, but it's not really a solution at all. There are plenty of alternatives out there than can provide just as much relief without causing you even more problems in the process.

If the Abilify isn't doing anything to help you with your hallucinations then you should definitely talk to your doctor. Maybe you need a higher dosage or a different medication entirely. Either way, you shouldn't have to be suffering from something that can be rather easily fixed. I think scheduling an appointment with your doctor is the best thing that you can do for yourself. I know how frustrating it is, going through multiple medications and constantly trying to find ones that work. But I promise you that it gets easier. Eventually you find something that truly helps you and it makes things so much easier.

Life may be difficult right now but try your best to believe that it's not going to stay this way forever. Things can (and will!) improve for you. Just try to hang in there until they do. You're more than welcome to message me if you ever need someone to talk to. Take care


   
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