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TheTameLion Offline
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Wither - May 13th 2015, 05:18 AM

The different ways people react to seeing others self harm or generaly in pain. Some like my should be friends genuinely care and want to help. They try to help until they feel like I've been "sad" for too long. When I ask why they're treating me with contempt, they say it's because I'm not myself. So they care while it's convenient. They try to talk you out of slicing your skin and they try to give alternatives. Then they abandon you as if you're a dog that shit on the carpet one too many times. Then there are the people who pretend to care, they're the ones who say "we can talk" and when you try to take them up on it they day they're busy. At first they look like people who care, but unlike them they never cared to begin with. Then there are the people who see me as a mental case. I had an elderly man approach me today and whipped a towel at me and sneered "clean yourself up you're a fucking mess". All of them hurt but nothing hurts more than having someone tell you that they'll "be there for you until the end of the univers" then 3 days later tell you that you're drowning them. I'm sitting here looking at my Crimson wrist, and yeah. I'm ashamed. I'm ashamed because I couldn't handle it. Because I am weak, but the weaker I am the worse they get and the weaker I get. I'm just killing time until I wither into nothingness.
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Re: Wither - May 13th 2015, 05:41 AM

It isn't right that people say that they are going to care and try to help you and then leave you like that. I am so sorry that so many people have put you down like that, because you seriously don't deserve that. I know that I myself have had mixed reactions from friends, but there are people that care. The same is true for you. You will find people who truly do care and truly do want to help. Don't lose hope, because those people are honestly out there and you will find them someday.

Maybe you can talk to a therapist or counselor in the meantime, because they chose the career path they did because they care. They can be someone to listen to and help you solve some of the problems and cope in better ways.

You are not weak though. You are still trying your hardest, I can tell because you are posting here. You are doing the right thing by trying your hardest and that makes you strong. You are still in this battle, you are still fighting the good fight, and you can get through this.

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