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Stormy Rainbow Offline
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I NEED TO FEEL SOMETHING. - September 28th 2015, 05:22 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of eating disorders, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I tried to post for help on this group for alummni of TK. Which a residental and they basically told me to take it down. And there is where everyone gets there help. People post much more triggering things then I did and I put a warning on it.

I feel like shit worse then I did when I asked for the help. I want to cut any and all of my body and not stop until my whole body is covered in blood. I want to eat so I can purge just to feel something. I need to feel. I am afraid i'll try other methods of self-harm as well like burning, I already bruise myself, or like making dry burns with stuff I can't say here, erase burns or anything. I can't tell anyone I feel like this until the 4th of October or i might miss out on vacation this Tuesday

I JUST NEED TO FUCKING FEEL..



   
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Re: I NEED TO FEEL SOMETHING. - September 28th 2015, 07:26 PM

I am so sorry to hear about everything that you are going through right now.

You said that this group deleted your post when people post more triggering things than you do. Does this group have any sort of moderator you can talk to about this and ask why your post was deleted? They should be willing to explain what was it that made the post warrant deletion, and they may be willing to work with you or at least support you via private messages.

You should be so proud of yourself for asking for help though, because that takes so much courage. I am sorry that you were shot down, but remind yourself that the fact that you asked for help in the first place shows a lot about you. It shows that you are trying so hard and really do want to recover and avoid doing the negative behaviors, and that is something worth noticing.

You were in residential, though. Did they give you any tips or things to try when you get bad urges? Try and think back to the skills they have taught you along your journey and see if any of them may help.

You said you need to feel. Maybe you can try reading an emotional book or watching a movie, as long as these things won't trigger you. Maybe you can try and find kind things to do for yourself because you deserve to pamper yourself, and it can help to relax you a bit.

Maybe you can take a walk, because that way you will be clearing your mind a little, which may help. It may just feel nice to enjoy the scenery that is around you and get away from some of what is going on.

I know that you can do this. You are really strong!

-Dez


   
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