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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Taylah Offline
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Unhappy I'm pathetic - May 7th 2017, 07:45 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I almost 4 yrs clean.
But I want to cut every day. I can't get the thoughts of it away. Some days area worse than others. But its everyday. And I don't know if I could keep being strong.
I have thoughts of that and killing myself everyday.
I'm starting to think that doing either of them would be ok.
I don't know. It's hard to explain.
Sorry you probably read something that makes no sense now.

If you ever need to PM/VM me you can if you want
Clean since 13 July 2013 (I think)
Z ♥️ 4/4/16
Z 💍 25/9/18 (unofficial)
Z 💍 14/10/18
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm pathetic - May 8th 2017, 04:10 PM


Being almost four years free of self-harm is awesome. What alternatives have you been using throughout these years? Do you have any favorites? Maybe you can try your favorite alternatives. If they don't work, it could help to look for some new ones.

Do you know if there is anything in particular making you feel like harming yourself? If you know of anything, perhaps you can try to work on it so you can decrease the urges to hurt yourself.

Are the thoughts obsessive? If they are, it can be hard to let them go. You could try mindfulness to see if it helps.

Have you been able to talk to someone about how you're feeling? Getting it out of your head could do a world of good. If you're not comfortable talking to someone, or if you can't talk to someone, maybe you can keep a journal or blog about how you've been feeling.

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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm pathetic - May 9th 2017, 01:19 AM


4 years is such a long time and you should be so so proud of yourself for getting to that stage. Somehow, regardless of the urges you have, you've kept going for this long. You've shown you're capable of getting through it, and that's amazing. Recovery is a process, and it'll never be easy. The urges make it difficult but they aren't in control - you are. What techniques do you use usually to get through the urges? Is it that these are less effective now? Could you try something else? Maybe you have a hobby you could do, like reading or writing, that will keep you busy enough that the urges don't get too strong. You could also try talking to a friend or family member. You could tell them how you've been feeling if you're comfortable doing so as it might help you feel like you have someone looking out for you when the days are bad. Otherwise, just talking in general may help you feel a bit better! You could sit and watch a film or TV show, or talk about something you've read or seen on TV for instance. Keeping busy and being surrounded by people can be a great way to distract yourself and feel better over all.

I know that it's hard to get through but hurting yourself in any way will never be ok. You don't deserve to inflict pain on yourself, especially if you're hurting on the inside already! You're strong enough to get through this. Keep trying to find alternatives that help, and of course, use TH as much as you need to. If you need anything at all you're welcome to PM me!
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm pathetic - May 9th 2017, 03:23 PM

Cassado these thoughts are always there. I don't know why they are more so now.
You could say they're obsessive they don't stop.
I've kinda talked to friends and written stuff down but I have no time with work to see anyone.

Everglow, I've tried my techniques but the thoughts are stronger than them this time. I've tried so many.
I have talked to friends slightly about it. And j have been busy with work so that has also helped.

Thank you guys.

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Clean since 13 July 2013 (I think)
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Z 💍 14/10/18
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm pathetic - May 17th 2017, 06:35 AM

Try to find something to get busy at. Like sports, games, etc. Something that would definitely take all the negative vibes away. I know you are a strong person. Just stay positive and you can past through it.

Last edited by Palmolive; May 21st 2017 at 10:07 PM. Reason: Removing link (leading others offsite)
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
Palmolive Offline
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Re: I'm pathetic - May 17th 2017, 10:59 PM

Hey there

Thank you for coming to us here!

I'm so sorry things are tough right now. I wanted to start by saying 4 years self harm free is absolutely amazing and proves how much stronger you are than it is. That is really something to be proud of and I hope you see how amazing it is.

Self harm can be addictive. It is amazing that you're self harm free for four years however that doesn't mean the thoughts and urges as well as well as the underlying issues simply go away. You are not alone in feeling this way. Do you know what triggers the urges? Maybe if you could work more on the underlying issues triggering this, then it would be some what "easier" for you to manage the urges and even maybe the urges will become less intense. Know that you are always more than welcome to talk to us here about anything at all. We will always try our best to help and we will never judge you at all. You can turn to other people too. Do you have any friends or family members you feel able to talk to about this? Or even a school nurse/counsellor, teacher or tutor or someone such as your GP/doctor. All these people care about you and I am sure will want to help as much as they can but they can only do so if they know what's going on for you and how you feel.

Suicide is never the way out and I think it's important for you to recognise that and to tell your self it is not an option. You have a life ahead of you and so much to see, experience and achieve and while it probably all feels really hard now and achieving things may seem impossible, it isn't. When we are in dark places, we struggle to see the good and struggle to see what we're capable off, but you can do so much with your life and in life. You deserve life and deserve that chance. I know some people find it really helpful to write a list of reasons to live. It can be things in the short term or in the long and you don't have to do it all at once either but you can take your time so it doesn't become overwhelming etc. You could then make a poster from the idea's and get creative and stick it up somewhere to remind you each day of the reason's to keep on fighting.

I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now, but know you are never alone and that nothing lasts forever. These feelings and thoughts shall too pass. Keep on going and remember we're here, always.

Hope and wishes,

"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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