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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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I don't know why I'm writing this - June 26th 2017, 07:18 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

My scars have gone up from 15 to 26. I just want to keep cutting until my whole arm is covered in scratches that are bleeding. It helps so much. Now I don't want to sound like a hypocrite because I always tell people that SH isn't the way and they should use alternatives. I have tried alternatives and it doesn't help. Life is just a pain in the a** right now, and I can't deal with it. This is my way of coping and I just don't know what to do. I don't know whether I should get help or not. My parents probably won't pay for it and a don't want to tell them. What should I do? I'm sorry if I'm wasting you time. People have harder struggles than me and I feel like I'm just whining. Sorry. And I don't know why I'm cutting. My life is perfectly fine right now, I just feel like cutting. Idk.
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Re: I don't know why I'm writing this - June 26th 2017, 11:26 PM

How can life be a pain in the ass and perfectly fine right now? I think you are probably struggling with a lot and you are justified in feeling the way you do. Even if there have been no horrible events to happen to you, depression can get people who live even the most flawless lives.
If you feel like you're being a hypocrite, try to take your own advice. Reread your post but cover up your username. Pretend someone else wrote this, and think of what you would say to them.
We are our own worst critics. A lot of times we treat ourselves a lot more unfairly than we treat others, and that's not okay whether you think so or not. I always like to check my hypocrisy towards myself by thinking through my problems and giving myself advice. It helps to draw a line between how horribly I'm treating myself, and how I should be treating myself.
It can be hard to do at first, but it's pretty enlightening once you do.

When people say alternatives just don't work for them, what I hear is that they just haven't tried the right alternative yet. Forget everything you think of when you hear the word "alternatives" and just focus on finding something you like to do or that gives you that same kind of release as when you choose to harm yourself.
Harming yourself is an addiction because of the chemicals your brain releases when feeling pain. So basically... get addicted to something else that doesn't bring pain, but still releases similar chemicals. I don't mean drugs or anything. I mean the positive type of addiction.
For me, in order to stop self-harming, I just kept exercising. I've been on a strict workout schedule ever since, which releases the endorphins to keep me at peace with myself and help me handle my stress better, but also leaves me better in shape and happier with my body and myself as a whole.
For you, that could mean anything you enjoy doing. Just keep trying to find something and don't give up and say "alternatives don't work for me" because one will, eventually.

i don't know what i'm supposed to do
haunted by the ghost of you
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