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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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I messed up. Help please! - July 15th 2017, 08:01 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

So I was cutting my shoulder (as in self harm), There's 10+ cuts. Then I thought "What if I have to get another immunization shot?" I have to get shots for school. The doctor will certainly see the cuts/scars. What am I supposed to do? I don't own any makeup and I can't buy any. Help.


I live with my aunt and uncle. They are both certified paramedics. And quite strict. I don't know what they'll do if/when they find out. I'm scared.
   
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Re: I messed up. Help please! - July 15th 2017, 11:59 AM

Hey there,
Welcome to Teenhelp!
I think youve already did the first step; you reached out to this site and I hope you get what you're looking for here

I can relate to feeling I've messed up, trapped myself in some way both with self harm and other things. Sometimes places we thought were not visible end up having to be exposed.

I'm wondering if you can ask for the shot to be done on the other arm instead? The doctor will know the ins and outs and can tell you yes or no about this question, as there might be a certain procedure but with blood tests, Ive gotten it on either arm. It depends on the vein more and one arm might be a better fit than the other.
I think with immunizarion shots, the general rule is to do the less dominant arm but since I'm guessing that's where your self harm wounds are, perhaps you can try getting it on your dominant arm this time. Hopefully it won't be too paunful. Do you know how many you'll be needing? I think 1 or 2 shots per a visit at most because it isn't good to bombard the body with live viruses.

I was wondering though if perhaps slowly you can open up to your doctor if that's something you're comfortable with?
Remember that we are here for you and if you want to talk to someone about your self harm, why you do it, the root cause, how to stop and so on, you're more than welcomed to post about that too.

When will your doctor's appointment be? Let us know how it goes if you want. I am hoping things work out okay.
   
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Re: I messed up. Help please! - July 17th 2017, 12:55 PM

If they're close enough together, you might be able to put a large band-aid over them and say that you accidentally scraped your shoulder on something.

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Re: I messed up. Help please! - July 18th 2017, 06:51 AM

Well hopefully you can find an adult who will understand that cutting is just a sign of a medical mental depression problem that is treatable and they'll start you on some antidepressant medication and if you're lucky the first one you try might actually work and after a few weeks you'll start to slowly feel better. If not then you might need to switch and try a different antidepressant medication and try that, and if that one doesn't work, keep trying different ones until you find the one that does work for you, because when you do it will make all the difference, and you'll slowly start to feel much better, and you won't be suffering so much anymore, and you won't have any desire to cut anymore, because you won't be suffering so there won't be any need to.

Good doctors are supposed to be alert to these signs of cutting and recognize them for what they are, signs that there is deep suffering going on that there shouldn't be, and it's a medical problem, I know it seems like it's the world, because I've been there, and then when I found the right medication the world slowly didn't change at all but my suffering slowly went away for no reason and I realized it was there for no reason in the first place. Best thing is find someone like us who've been there and we can show you various paths to wellness.

Most important is to keep Hope that you won't have to suffer like this forever, there is treatment, it is treatable, the sooner you get to a doctor and started the better (the sooner your parents understand it's a medical problem the better).

Here's a link to a story that further describes how it's a medical problem and there is a way out:
http://www.wingofmadness.com/depress...cal-illness-19

If your parents won't understand, then find the adults who do understand, and they'll take care of your parents. Your parents love you and may not understand and they just need another adult who does understand to convince them to let the doctor treat your medical depression so you can be well again. The adults who do understand are probably more numerous than you think. Probably 10% of the adults around you have experienced it themselves. Your school may have a counselor. A church may have a pastor or an organized group who understands. A local organization. Mental Wellness Center. NAMI. DBSA. There may be a phone number you can call. Maybe 2-1-1 and ask for information.

Well sorry I don't have a specific name or address phone number for you. I just know there's a lot of people out there who care about you and if they only knew they'd get you all the help you need and you'll be on the road to wellness and you'll have a happy life in the future if you can hang in there.

Best wishes.
   
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Re: I messed up. Help please! - July 18th 2017, 11:08 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by del677 View Post
Well hopefully you can find an adult who will understand that cutting is just a sign of a medical mental depression problem that is treatable and they'll start you on some antidepressant medication and if you're lucky the first one you try might actually work and after a few weeks you'll start to slowly feel better. If not then you might need to switch and try a different antidepressant medication and try that, and if that one doesn't work, keep trying different ones until you find the one that does work for you, because when you do it will make all the difference, and you'll slowly start to feel much better, and you won't be suffering so much anymore, and you won't have any desire to cut anymore, because you won't be suffering so there won't be any need to.

Good doctors are supposed to be alert to these signs of cutting and recognize them for what they are, signs that there is deep suffering going on that there shouldn't be, and it's a medical problem, I know it seems like it's the world, because I've been there, and then when I found the right medication the world slowly didn't change at all but my suffering slowly went away for no reason and I realized it was there for no reason in the first place. Best thing is find someone like us who've been there and we can show you various paths to wellness.

Most important is to keep Hope that you won't have to suffer like this forever, there is treatment, it is treatable, the sooner you get to a doctor and started the better (the sooner your parents understand it's a medical problem the better).

Here's a link to a story that further describes how it's a medical problem and there is a way out:
http://www.wingofmadness.com/depress...cal-illness-19

If your parents won't understand, then find the adults who do understand, and they'll take care of your parents. Your parents love you and may not understand and they just need another adult who does understand to convince them to let the doctor treat your medical depression so you can be well again. The adults who do understand are probably more numerous than you think. Probably 10% of the adults around you have experienced it themselves. Your school may have a counselor. A church may have a pastor or an organized group who understands. A local organization. Mental Wellness Center. NAMI. DBSA. There may be a phone number you can call. Maybe 2-1-1 and ask for information.

Well sorry I don't have a specific name or address phone number for you. I just know there's a lot of people out there who care about you and if they only knew they'd get you all the help you need and you'll be on the road to wellness and you'll have a happy life in the future if you can hang in there.

Best wishes.

I think it is important to take the OP's age, being 13 years old into consideration And that not everyone self harms from a depression that has no reason or from depression at all. Generally speaking there has been a shift from what was called the medical model to what is called biopsychosocial and cultural perspective (model) on mental illness.

@OP: We can talk about medications if that's something you feel is necessary but it is a big decision. And for especially for a 13 year old there may be better options.
   
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Re: I messed up. Help please! - July 21st 2017, 05:01 AM

I agree that if they are close together you can get a large bandaid (if you have access) and cover them. Also depending on where they are on your shoulder you should be able to wear a short sleeve shirt and still be able to keep the cuts covered. In most cases, a doctor only needs access to the arm they are going to give the immunization too. I believe in most cases doctors give shots on the arm that you don't use (if you are left handed they will do the right arm). At least they always ask me what arm I use most. So, if that is the case you might not actually have to show them the shoulder where the cut is.

That being said, I think it would be beneficial if you considered finding someone to talk to about this. There definitely is no need to commit to taking medication at this point in time. However, if you could find a therapist you could at least get support and they could also evaluate you and determine if you would do better on medication or just by utilizing therapy.

Best of luck.


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