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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Emmylou Offline
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Help - I don't know why I'm doing this to myself?? - December 9th 2017, 12:39 AM

Last year I developed the habit of snapping a hair bobble against my wrist when I was stressed out of anxious. Sometimes it was just a nervous habit but other times i know i do it because the pain gives me relief and calms me down. There even sometimes i can't sleep until I've snapped the hair bobble against my wrist 500 times. I now don't go anywhere without hair bobble and ties on my wrist because it's reassuring to know they're there if i need them and to also cover the marks I've left cause I'm pretty embarrassed.

Over time this habit developed into me pinching/nipping myself as well which also leaves red marks and bruises. I think I transferred to the pinching because people are less likely to notice me doing it since a hair bobble can be quite loud in public.

But what's worrying me is that recently I've been scraping/ slashing my thighs and arms with a pin. I don't know why I'm doing this. I feel so ashamed of myself and guilty after I do it and i hate the cuts and scars.

Are these things self harm? What do i do? Please help - I'm really stressed about it. Im terrified someone will notice the cuts and scars.

Should I tell the counsellor im seeing in school at the minute? I currently go for another issue but I'm kinda considering talking about it with her cause im so worried and stressed about it. But I don't want anyone to know about this - I just want to have my burden about it eased slightly but I'm hesitant to tell cause I know that the counsellor has to break confidentiality and tell the pastoral teacher and my parents if I'm self harming. Do you think confidentiality would be broken with non serious self harm like this?
Thanks everyone
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Virgil Offline
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Re: Help - I don't know why I'm doing this to myself?? - December 9th 2017, 02:38 AM

What you are doing is self-harm. I would recommend talking to the counselor, because this, while probably not all too serious now (I'm going from your pov), could escalate into something a lot more life-threatening and dangerous. Trust me on this one. Yes, the counselor is obligated to break confidentiality even in minor cases of self-harm, but I don't think that should deter you from talking to her. Stay safe. I'm here for you.
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Emmylou Offline
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Re: Help - I don't know why I'm doing this to myself?? - December 9th 2017, 03:42 PM

Okay thank you but is there anyway I could tell the counsellor without them having to break confidentiality. What I'm doing isn't serious or life threatening so I don't see why they would have to tell the school or my parents?
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Re: Help - I don't know why I'm doing this to myself?? - December 9th 2017, 03:53 PM

I am sorry that you are having a hard time with this. When you self harm you can use anything to do this and it can be different from what others are using to do this, it's all on how the person feels to do this or to help them when doing this. Can you try talking with you're school counselor and letting them know that you are having a hard time with this and you need help but you want to keep it between the two of you and see how it goes. You can also write a letter too if you are not able to say this to help you.

Also when you get the feeling to self harm try getting you're mind off of it, try going for a walk and you can have music with you. Also put on a funny movie or a TV show to make you laugh, also try calling a friend or getting out of the house for a while. I hope you will be ok soon. Hugs.
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