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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Noire Offline
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Can't figure out the reason for my SH - March 2nd 2018, 05:29 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

My life is great. Like, really really great. I am able bodied, I have family and friends that love me, I (generally) don't have too much money stress, and I am doing well in school (although I will admit it's stressful). I know I am much more fortunate than most, but I'm not here to go on and on about my life circumstances. I have a serious problem that I need help with.

I have self-harmed for 12.5 years now. Almost half my life. In that time I've engaged in some extreme behaviors, but yesterday I did something new: I tried to break my bones. I don't know for sure yet as I haven't had an x-ray (I'll have one later this afternoon at urgent care), but at the very least I have pain, swelling, and bruising. To be fair I had a little help (I hurt it accidentally at first), but I know my actions made it worse.

I can't tell anyone at the moment, although I will tell my therapist later. The thing is that I don't know why I did it. I'm not unhappy. I wasn't triggered. The only thing that was wrong is my stress about school but at the time I self-harmed I was feeling all-around content. I can't explain it. I postulated that it might be as a cry for help but I already get so much attention from the people I want attention from, and besides, that's not really like me; if I need someone to pay attention to me or to know I'm struggling I generally ask for more time/tell them I'm not doing well. So what could it be? Emotional release, trying to feel something, and a cry for help are the only reasons I know of. Could someone help shed light on this? Thanks.

Note: I believe there is nothing wrong with self-harming as a cry for help. Too often people make it out to mean someone is a "fake" or "emo." It's as much a valid reason as any other and it doesn't deserve to be mocked or judged.


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Re: Can't figure out the reason for my SH - March 2nd 2018, 08:40 PM

Did you think about trying to break your bones before you did it, or did you just do it? The reason I ask is because if you did it without thinking about it you may not have been super aware of things and there may not be a reason. Perhaps it was just an impulsive act? Or, you were stressed about school and went ahead and did it as some kind of release.

Have you ever self-harmed just because you can and not necessarily because you're triggered? Some people will self-harm due to boredom or they'll do it just because they're able to.

You said you were feeling content. Have you ever felt content or excited and then felt the urge to hurt yourself? I've heard that sometimes the mind confuses happiness or excitement with anxiety because they happen in a similar way and that could be triggering.

Regardless, I hope you are able to find a reason surrounding your self-harm.


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Re: Can't figure out the reason for my SH - March 5th 2018, 02:07 AM

Hey,

Self harm becomes an addiction and even if life is going great there are still going to be times when you think about it and, possibly, act on it. It took me ages to figure this out and it was one of the things that made recovery difficult. If I was bored I would want to harm myself, for example.

I don't think they put enough emphasis on the fact that self harm does become an addiction. I am not really sure what helped me get to a point where I was able to overcome the desire to harm myself even if I wasn't triggered. I think a lot of it was just avoidance and utilizing alternatives. I know there was a period where I spent hours in chat because it distracted me so well.

I think discussing this all with your therapist might help because they might be able to help you figure out the best way to get through this.

It sucks but there doesn't always have to be a reason for self harm. At least, that is what my experience has been.


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