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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Saria Offline
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Exclamation I can't stop - May 30th 2009, 11:29 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I only started self-harming about two months ago and now I can't stop. Everytime I do it I just feel as though everything is going to disappear. It seems all I can think about is self-harming and I never can concentrate. It has got to the point when I am doing during school with anything I can get my hands on and if I can't use anything I scatch myself that hard with my fingernails it cuts my skin. After I self-harm or if I am thinking about I start shaking all over and can't stop. My best friends knows about it but she also self-harms so she isn't much support. One of my teachers is really worrried about me and keeps asking what is wrong I want to tell her but I don't want her to judge me.


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I can't stop - May 30th 2009, 08:24 PM

Hi Saria,

I replied to your thread in D&S too, it sounds like your going through a really tough time. Im sorry about your self harm, it must be difficult feeling the way you do. You said it makes you feel like everything is going to disappear but there are other ways of getting that feeling. I know what you mean, its like blocking everything out? Have you tried playing music really loud and closing your eyes? I find that that helps me because it feels like im not there and I just concentrate on the music.

Its good that your friend knows about the self harm but its a shame you don't feel she is a good support for you. What is it that makes her not good at supporting you? She should still be able to help you even if she self harms herself but if she won't/can't there are other people who could. I think it might be a good idea to tell your teacher. It really sounds like she cares about you because she doesn't have to ask you whats wrong. You said that you are worried about her judging you but to be honest I don't think she would do, she sounds to nice to do anything like that and lots of teachers are actually very understanding of it! If you tell her then you would have somebody to talk to and support you through this, what do you think? She might be able to help with how you are feeling about your mum as well...

Im going to give you the link for the distractions thread because its useful when your trying to stop self harming [click here]

Hope this helps
Jen


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I can't stop - May 30th 2009, 09:14 PM

Hey Saria,

It seems like you are really struggling with your self harm at the moment. I know you say you have only done it for 2 months but that doesn't mean it is any less addictive. It is like any addiction, which is so difficult to give up. But Saria you can do it; you really can! It won't be easy but you have come this far already, which can't have been easy.

Your teacher isn't there to judge you. It seems like she is concerned about you and only wants to help because if she didn't care she wouldn't bother to ask. She will only want to help you but she can't help you unless she knows what is happening. It might be a huge weight off you if you are able to confide in. Then you might feel less alone with all of this. You never are alone.

I know that feeling where it makes you think that everything disappears. But take a step back and think how you feel later on after self harming. Maybe a few hours later you might feel the need to self harm again. So really everything doesn't disappear because you have to keep self harming to get that feeling. There are much healthier ways to express how you feel. I do know though that sometimes these don't feel helpful but you have to keep trying them. In the end you will get there and you will be self harm free.

If you ever need anything then you are more than welcome to PM me.

Stay strong :-)
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Saria Offline
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Re: I can't stop - June 1st 2009, 11:42 AM

Things seem so difficult. I can't stop myself from harming for very long at all. It seems involuntary know and the only way out, even though I know that's not true. I just want to give in. I don't have the energy to resist from SHing and it just makes all the pressure go away. I just wish there was an easy way out without having to use so much energy!!!


"Feeling Change - Memories Don't"
"Enjoy the Moment and don't let it end"
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile."
"He comforts us when we are in trouble, so that we can share that same comfort with others in trouble." 2 Corinthians 1:4
PM me anytime
Tumblr
http://1000reasonstosmile.tumblr.com/
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Take501 Offline
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Re: I can't stop - June 1st 2009, 01:22 PM

hey sarah, you just started why? would you start it it is an adiction thats wors than drugs. i recomend that you stop while you can rather try somethke like wrighting hard on you !but not let your skin beak!good luck marco an pm anytime
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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I can't stop - June 1st 2009, 05:57 PM

Saria, as I said before it doesn't make everything disappear though does it. It might be a release in the short term but you have to keep doing it again to get that release. Is there anyone you can talk to about this? Usually a problem shared is a problem halved. I really think you should try and tell someone. It is scary but it will be worth it in the end. Stay strong :-)
   
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