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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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LillyImp Offline
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I want to stop. - January 17th 2009, 02:13 PM

I've been hurting my self in one form or another since the sixth grade, I'm now in ninth. It's geting worse. I'm to ashamed to tell. My moms very sick, she can't deal with this, and if they send me away.. everyone will know! I'm so pathetic! It's like some freakish addiction, I want to forget.
I don't know what to do.
What should I do?
   
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Re: I want to stop. - January 17th 2009, 02:21 PM

Hey Lilly,
listen...you're not pathetic. Self harm is hard to get over. And even when you don't feel sad you just do it. And ofcourse I'm sure you've heard that it's not good for you and that there are better ways to deal.

And people dont' always understand, so it's normal for you not to want people to find out. But there are some really good listeners out there who could help you stop and want to help you stop.

You should tell a trusted teacher or guidance councler. Sometimes the councler can promise not to tell your parents (like my situation) and that way your mom won't have to deal with the stress right away. She probably wants the best for you and if she is as sick as you say she is, this option would help you but keep her at ease.

If you wana talk more you can PM me
XOXO
Kaila


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missy mel Offline
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Re: I want to stop. - January 17th 2009, 07:48 PM


Heya Lilly,
Self harm IS an addiction, but like any other addiction you can get out of it.
You've been harming yourself for a long time, and it feels right now like you have nowhere to turn, but admitting this is a problem is one step to quitting.
Do you know what triggers you? What causes you to have the urge to SH, sometimes working this out is helpful, if you can find what is causing the problem it is easier to change the situation.
Try maybe talking to some friends or teachers if you feel you are able to, or your mum, I know it is hard but she will want to help if you let her in to help you.
SH is something you feel ashamed of, it may be caused by what you are feeling at the moment, yet you would not be ashamed of laughing as a result of happiness, this is a sign that something is troubling you, an outward sign, use it to get help you need?
Look out for alternatives which work for you, I am sure you will find some which help you, or try gradually decreasing the frequency with which you harm?
Take care, I hope things work out for you.
Mel
   
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Re: I want to stop. - January 18th 2009, 06:34 AM

Hi Lilly.
It's nothing to be ashamed of, especially if you're seeking help for your problem, that's the best step (and one of the hardest, but worthwhile) that you can take. Honestly, it's absolutely wonderful and you should be so proud of yourself. You will need support through this, as it's a hard thing. Have you talked about your problem to anyone? I know that you said that your mum couldn't deal with this, but do you have another adult you can trust? You could try telling another relative, a teacher you trust or your doctor. Don't be scared, they're there to help you, and they should be proud that you've chosen to get help. You're not pathetic, you're so strong for admitting you have a problem and getting help. Remember, we're always here to support you, too
   
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Re: I want to stop. - January 18th 2009, 07:39 PM

Lilly, just because you cut that doesn't mean that they will send you away. Your mom may be sick, but you need help too. I really wish that you would talk to her so she can provide you with the love and support you need. Talking can really help you get through things and your mother can provide you with professional help.

Why do you think they will send you away? If you talk to your mother about this, there are plenty of things that you can do to help your SH at home--such as therapy. I really think that you should talk with her about your problem and let her know that you want to deal with things at home.

You shouldn't be afraid to seek help because you are worried about someone finding out that you are doing so. You shouldn't worry about what others think of you. You are your own person and people should applaud you for going through things like therapy to get yourself better.


--A
   
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