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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
faded rainbow Offline
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need to slip - August 2nd 2009, 10:10 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

i know this may be in the wrong forum...i just dont have much luck with response in the others....
my nan died a few days ago and im struggling so much i feel like i need to slip up and cut something ive not done in a while i just need it to take my mind of this just for a few minutes
i feel like ive been told i cant even grieve by work because my nans not technically immediate family i should be in work apparently but how can i be when the most precious person in my life has gone forever
she ment so much to me my nan dying is as bad as if my mum were to die i spent my life round my nans or on the phone to her id do anything for her and vice versa i feel like my heart has been trampled on how on earth is she not my immdiate family i cant work through this!
i want to close my eyes and go with my nan she was all i lived for <3 and im struggling to get by i know it hurts my mum to say that but ive always been extremely close to my nan and i feel guilty for saying it but i cant help how i feel


im just so tired of being here
suppresed by all my childish fears

these wounds wont seem to heal
this pain is just too real
theres just too much that time cannot erase

waterloo road fans http://petitions.tigweb.org/saveeddie
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
blackrose
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Re: need to slip - August 3rd 2009, 12:00 AM

Hey There.I'm sorry you haven't been getting many replies, sometimes posts just seem to slip past the radar, but you have posted in the right place.I am so so sorry you lost your nana. Losing someone that close to you is one of the hardest things to deal with and the way your work treated it was downright wrong and must have made things an awful lots worse for you.Is there anyone you can speak to about how you are feeling and how the loss of your nan has effected you?As for the cutting, it won't change anything and it won't make you feel better - not in the long run anyway. But I know how easy it is to slip back into SH, I have done it many times myself. Try to stay strong and do something to take your mind off the urge to cut. Maybe write a story, or try some of the alternatives in this forum. They are really helpful If you want to talk more, PM me anytime Magsxx



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Hold your head high princess, for tomorrow is another day.

You can do tonight without the help of a blade and wake in the morning with the feeling of accomplishment

PM me anytime, I am always here to be a shoulder to cry on, an ear to hear whats bothering you and words to make you see the hope








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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Faye. Offline
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Re: need to slip - August 3rd 2009, 12:09 AM

Hey there,

I'm so sorry to hear about your nan. It's obvious you were very close to her and it's understandable that you feel like this. Don't feel guilty for feeling this bad, there's nothing to be guilty for. I can't imagine how horrible it is. Check out this, its a really useful web page that might help you deal with your loss.

You say that you feel you need to cut. Self harm is a want not a need however strong that want is. Hurting yourself might help you forget what's happened for a while brut only for a while and then the problem will still be there and now also the guilt of self harming. I appreciate it is really hard, but if you want to you can resist cutting.

I know that it seems there's no point if your nan's not around. But she would want you to carry on, not to give up on life. And at some point you can turn this very negative experience into something that makes you stronger.

Good luck, PM me if you need anything,

Faye


Feel free to PM me

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