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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
KiwiGal Offline
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Name: Beka
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Exclamation why???? - August 17th 2009, 09:11 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

im not the streotype Emo, just me, who ever i am.
Why?
why im i here, why ,why,why.
im not not anything thats good for the world.
Why
its a question i think is soo important that its carved on my leg, i have nail marks up my back, i have scars up my are they are fading but the memories never will those words will for ever haunt me, its driving me nut.
i dont want to live anymore, but.....i cant hurt my mum.
my friends would get over it , but mum never will,so i have had so settle with harm, it makes the words go away if even for a little while.
makes it that little bit easier to carry on.

Last edited by Prozac; August 17th 2009 at 09:16 PM. Reason: Triggering prefix added.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Ngikhona Offline
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Re: why???? - August 18th 2009, 04:06 AM

Hey Beka-
It's really a pain to have people stereotype you, especially when it's with something as silly as "emo" (whatever that is). It's good that you know you're different from what they say you are.

But as much as you may think I'm wrong and disagree, you are something good for the world, no matter what you've done, are doing, or will do. I'm making the assumption from you saying you're not good that you've made some mistakes. People make mistakes, but you just have to tell yourself that it's ok to make mistakes. Really think about when the last time was that you told yourself "it's ok".

The memories that've haunted you won't go away. The best thing you can do is just try to think of any ways that maybe these things have made you stronger, and try to accept that they happened. People try to ignore bad things, but it makes them worse in the long run.

It's great you're still here because you don't want to hurt your mom. I'm also sure your friends care more than you think.

Even if the self-harm helps for a little, it is not a healthy solution by any means. There's evidence all over here that self-harm will make things so much harder. Have you ever looked at the Alternatives to Self Harm thread? Here's a link for it: http://forums.teenhelp.org/f12-self-...ves-self-harm/
It's divided into a bunch of sections so you can find something that might help you best. Based on what you've said, I'd recommend things under the 'Alternatives that will give you a sensation (other than pain) without harming yourself' and 'Alternatives that will hopefully make you think twice about harming yourself' sections.

If you're strong enough to make it this far, you're strong enough to keep going. I am absolutely positive that you can get through all this and get past where you need pain to help you. PM me if you ever need anything.


"Love me for me, accept the fact I'm true, live like I want, fufill my dreams,
Dream of me, run out free, capture your words and never let them go."

I'll see you on the other side.
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
strong-but-weak Offline
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Re: why???? - August 19th 2009, 11:13 PM

I'm really, really sorry that you feel that way.
Self harm might make coping easier, but it isn't healthy. Find an outlet. Music, writing. Anything to express the way that you feel without hurting yourself or your family and friends.
You're right that your mom wouldn't get over it, but entirely wrong about yoru friends.
When you lose someone to suicide, you NEVER get over it. You would hurt them too. But hurting yourself hurts all of them as well.

I want to make you that you remember this because it is so, so important. You do matter in this world. You have a purpose and you have a calling. You are good for something. You haven't found it just yet, but if you can hold on you will. Learn to love yourself and then everyone can really love you.


And no matter what my heart [</3] says
I have to let you walk away
maybe someday

I can't fight for you anymore
But it's too hard to watch you fall.
I can't fight for you anymore
But watching you go breaks my heart
I can't fight for you anymore
But I want to.
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Self.Help. Offline
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Re: why???? - August 20th 2009, 02:01 AM

Those who hold no standards to their self worth fall into the question you ask.

This is not a vague question of "why?", "Who am I? Why am I here?". The only one who can answer those questions is in fact you.

Whatever conclusion one may draw, we are all here for one reason or another. Some see it as "I am here because my mommy loved my daddy.".

Others are not as fortunate to have come into this world under perfect circumstances. Like it or not, there are others worse off than yourself.

God put us in the world to better those around us. We are beautiful. Each and ever one of us. Those who smear this beauty do not truly cherish this world they are brought into. You are beautiful, your life is beautiful, your very being is beautiful. To be able to walk next to you is the best feeling. Fill your mind and soul with beauty. No one can take it from you unless you let them. No amount of pain or sorrow will strip your beauty. No one is in charge of you.

Remember. You are beautiful. Do not let anyone take it from you.
   
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