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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
acting101 Offline
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Thinking about telling someone... - August 31st 2009, 01:54 AM

So, I guess I can safely say I've started SHing.
I brand, bite myself, and occasionally scratch (I won't call it cutting, because I'm too scared to make it bleed). Nothing too major...
I know some friends that used to cut... and it's not like it would be a surprise to anyone based on my appearance...
I want to tell my best friend that I do it, just so that someone knows and so that I can talk to them.
But I don't know how to tell her. No idea how to get a conversation headed in the direction so that I can confess.
Any tips?
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
*Jen* Offline
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Re: Thinking about telling someone... - August 31st 2009, 02:25 AM

Hey Lily,

I think you are so brave and strong to be wanting to tell someone about your self harm. It is a huge step and it does take so much courage to tell someone about something so personal as self harm. But you can do it Lily. I think it is a great idea to tell your best friend because then at least she can support you through it and you won't be alone with it. I think once you have told her it will be a huge weight off you.

You could tell her face to face or you could write her a letter explaining things. A letter is helpful in that you won't have to think on the spot what you are going to say because you will have it all planned out. But you might prefer to just tell her. All you can do is be honest with her and explain to her. If she is a true friend she should be supportive and help you through it.

I really hope you manage to tell your best friend Lily You are so brave. Good luck!
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Re: Thinking about telling someone... - August 31st 2009, 03:14 AM

I know it was really hard for me when I first told my best friend, but once i did she was really supportive and wanted what was best for me. It was an awkward conversaion, but she asked a lot of questions which helped me in talking about it. I don't know if your friend will be the same, but if she's a best friend she'll do her best to understand and never leave your side
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Star Crow Offline
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Re: Thinking about telling someone... - August 31st 2009, 12:30 PM

The way I told my friend I cut was during a silence in our conversation. I told her there is something I really want to tell you, but I'm not sure I should... That got her curious enough to ask, and that way I coninced myself that I had no choice but to tell her.

Another thing I did was make one of my friends guess what one of my big secrets was and gave her give away hints. Also be prepared to answer many questions.

Hope everything goes well!
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Cazzum Offline
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Re: Thinking about telling someone... - August 31st 2009, 12:41 PM

I think a good way in which to tell her, as said above, just tell her there is something you need to tell her, and go for it. If she's your best friend, she will, without a doubt be supportive and try to help you stop.

I hope this problem does not get any worse, we would all hate too hear it, if you were actually cutting. I think, just be brave and possitive, and tell your best friend, she'll respect atleast that you've stood up and told her about it, and she will help you get through this.

Cazzum. x

"If my body dies, let my body die, but do not let my country die" - Genghis Khan

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Re: Thinking about telling someone... - August 31st 2009, 03:56 PM

Hey Lily,
That's great you want to tell someone about your SH. If you feel comfortable enough telling your friend in a conversation you can just say "I have something serious I need to talk to you about." That way your friend won't make a joke out of it and can do his/her best to help you out. If you don't feel comfortable talking to them, you can always write them a note. Tell them how you feel, what you need from them, and what is making you feel this way. Let me know how it goes.
PM me if you need anything,

Whatever it is, chances are I've been there.
If I can make it out, you can too.
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