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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Star Crow Offline
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Need help. - September 23rd 2009, 12:02 AM

one of my friends who has known about my cutting for a while has decided to go to the counslor. i told her it was ok, that I prefered that she didn't, but I wouldn't be mad at her if she did. I told her the progress I made, but she doesn't think it's good enough. She's afaid it's going to get really bad again.

What should I say to the counslor to convince him not to tell my parents. I'm really scared about what will happen if my parents find out.
please help!
   
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Re: Need help. - September 23rd 2009, 12:34 AM

Do your parents know about your cutting at all?
I think, in the long run, it'll be good for your parents to know. I know that's not what you want to hear, but it's true.
It'll suck at first, but they can really help you get better.
   
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Re: Need help. - September 23rd 2009, 12:39 AM

no they don't, In the long run I guess it could be helpful, but my parents are the type to let things blow over and leave them alone. I know they'll be really angry at first or at least my mom will.
   
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Re: Need help. - September 23rd 2009, 12:51 AM

I know how that is.
It's probably pretty scary to think about your parents finding out, but it's not that bad.
When my parents found out about my cutting I was really scared at first, but after like, a day I felt really good about not having to keep it a secret from them. And parents can really help if you let them.
   
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Re: Need help. - September 23rd 2009, 02:06 AM

I agree with what LoveFever said. I thought that telling my parents was going to be the end of the world. I had no clue what to even do in the situation. It sucked for a couple days, but it really was better. It turns out that they had known for a while but didn't know how to bring it up.

We don't even really talk about it, but I know I can always go to them if I need to- even if I don't always do that... But it's just a huge burden off your shoulders without that secret. They won't understand it and they might get angry just because they don't know how to deal with it. But you could just print them out some information and misconceptions about self injury so that they can understand it better and you don't have to go through that awkward conversation.

I know it's really scary but if your counselor does talk to them, you just have to brace yourself and weather the storm. You can do it. You've made it through a lot and it really is worth it in the end.

Hang in there. PM me if you ever need to talk.
Peace.
Hannah


Hope is real. Help is real. LOVE is the movement.
   
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Re: Need help. - September 23rd 2009, 04:07 AM

They cant tell your parents unless you tell them your are thinking of suicide and are still cutting, you can walk with the counsellors to put steps in place so you wont need to cut. when my friends found out that i was self harming( this is years ago now) they went to the school counsellor and psychologist. at first i was mad at them for this but in the end i knew it would help me. they looked out for me even though sometimes i would get sick of teachers not letting me leave the room unless someone went with me. your friends care about you. telling your parents can be hard but they love you and i am sure they would want to support you. Think about telling the school counsellor. it can really help.
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Re: Need help. - September 24th 2009, 09:42 PM

Thanks guys. I guess my parents finding out won't be too bad. I guess they would probubly find out eventually anyway, but it's the nerves thats really killing me. My friend set up an appointment with the counslor tommarro. She's going to try to make sure they don't tell my parents, but I really doubt that will work. I guess it will be a relief to get this out in the open.
   
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Re: Need help. - October 4th 2009, 10:00 AM

i dont know, when my friend went behind my back (this was like 3 years ago) and told our school nurse/councilor what i was doing, i was so pissed and scared and sad, like i couldnt stop crying because it was out and i was so nervous what the councilor would say and most importantly if she would tell my parents. and how much my life would change. when i talked to her, i begged her not to tell them but she did anyway. it sucked. a lot. but in the long run it was good because i got the help i needed.
   
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