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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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clueless - January 25th 2009, 04:47 PM

Alright.
Ever since seventh grade I've cut myself. Used to be my wrists, but I alternated to my ankle cuz it was easier to cover up. In seventh grade, our 'friend' pretended to b depressed and pretended to cut herself. Basically it was kind of a mockery, and she was a poser, and she admitted that it was all fake. While she did all this fake shit, I actually did cut myself, so I felt like I couldn't tell anyone because i'd be no better than her.
Well I'm in ninth grade, and I still can't stop. I stopped for almost three months, and just fifteen minutes ago I couldn't help myself. I almost called a friend so she could talk me through it, but no one knows still.
I don't know how to tell them without having all that fake shit brought up again. I've hid it for this long, and I'm not even sure I should tell them....I just need some advice...


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Re: clueless - January 25th 2009, 04:52 PM

I hate it when people did that. I was in a very similar position to you.
While this guy went around faking it and being an attention seeker, i had to stay silent cos if i mentioned anything people would say the same thing.
Im not sure how you can tell someone, unless you find someone you can totally trust, and say the reason you do it and that your not pretending... hopefully they'd understand..


*I'm a slow dying flower, in the frost-killing hour, turning sour and untouchable.*

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Re: clueless - January 25th 2009, 05:00 PM

And it's really hard...every time I get close to telling my friend I can't. I get choked up, and my words just get way to hard to say.
I'm not in with a very good group of friends. Because no matter if I actually do or not, to them I'd still b a fake. I have one good friend, but she is rly hard to talk to sometimes, but she's the only one who wouldn't judge.
It just feels like I have no one I can tell, or talk to, it's like, I can't do anything but I want to. I was good for a while, and I broke it, and I'm back where I started.
I just don't know what I can do.


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Re: clueless - January 25th 2009, 05:05 PM

Im not sure what else I can say apart from everyone on TH is here to support you and be here for you no matter what.
Maybe write it down on paper or something. or write all the bad feelings down on paper and shred them up... it might help to stop self harm..
However i dont know what might be able to help you stop it.. seeming as I havent found the answer yet.


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Re: clueless - January 25th 2009, 05:12 PM

SH is not an attention seeking activity. Don't worry about what your friend did, she was being silly, but you have something going on that is serious, and you deserve that to be completely appreciated.
If you don't mind reaching out to a teacher, then you could try writing it o na piece of paper and leaving it on a trusted teachers desk, if not, maybe writing on a piece of paper and leaving it in your friends locker would help, it's a less face to face way of doing it, it can make you feel less stressed.
Soemtimes explaining the reasons can be hard, so if you want to do anything, tru and sit down the night before and have a good hard think yourself about what you do, and what for,, and what bothers you. sometimes self-analysis brings understanding all around
Everyone on TH is here for you if you need us.
If you ever want to get in touch?
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Re: clueless - January 25th 2009, 05:35 PM

Thanks for caring, it really does mean a lot.
I''m gonna try stopping again, and I'll tell my friend.


~JB~
   
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Re: clueless - January 25th 2009, 07:38 PM

That's great.
Be proud of who you are, and you know we're all here for you!
   
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