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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Nomophobia Offline
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Thumbs down urging - February 19th 2009, 03:42 PM

hey, im desperate to stop and ive gone 10 days today without it... but im really urging now!!! nd im thinking things like is it really that bad.. and will it be so bad if i just cut one more time? but ive been through this all before! i really doont know wot to do!!! help?? someone??
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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: urging - February 19th 2009, 04:05 PM

Hey,

It's easy to think, just one more time and that's it, never again. But what about next time you have an urge, will there be another 'one more time'? Urges can be hard to fight but if you keep telling yourself one more cut won't be so bad, well, one cut can turn to two, and three, very easily. You'll be letting yourself get back into the cycle, is it worth it?

You might be having a strong urge right now but if you fight it, you have a good chance of beating it. Think of how much stronger you'll be if you can beat it. You'll be able to wake up tomorrow and think, you didn't give in. No matter how hard it was you fought. Think of how proud of yourself you'll be, how amazing it will feel to know you fought.

Keep yourself distracted for as long as you can, keep your hands busy and your mind off self-harm. Stay away from sharp objects, try to keep out of any room with things you could use to hurt yourself with. Maybe try keeping yourself around other people. The urge might not be as strong if there are other people around, would you really want to hurt yourself in front of them? When the urge is over, go and get rid of all your blades, all your SH tools. Bury them in your yard, toss them in a neighbor's trash, put them somewhere where you won't be tempted to go back to get them. When there's nothing you have to hurt yourself with, there can be a lot less temptation and urges can be easier to fight.

You can get through this. [: Hang in there. Let me know if you want to talk, take care of yourself.



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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: urging - February 19th 2009, 06:04 PM

I agree with Sarah...my low points are early morning and at night, but my days have been SH-free for a few mornings now because I happen to be working in the shop drilling/measuring/hammering things. Working with your hands and feeling like you've DONE something can really help supress the urges and distract you. Talking doesn't help alot of people, so when you can't lean on anyone else try being active even if it's just something like cleaning. Good luck, dear, you're doing great already <3 don't give in!
   
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Re: urging - February 19th 2009, 06:39 PM

Ten days is amazing! You can keep this up! You have made it this far, don't turn back now =] Urges happen, but there are many other ways to deal with them. Try using Alternatives and Distractions (see http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/showthread.php?t=130). I find that holding ice cubes can really help, or talking to a trusted friend, or just sitting and watching a silly comedic movie! There is no reason to keep cutting yourself, and you have the power to stop. You can get through this! I know it's hard, rough patches happen to everyone, but the only way for this all to get better is to work through them and be the strong girl you are! Don't give up hope either, you can get through this, people care about you. Care about yourself, too, you are a great person and do not deserve the pain.

If you ever want to talk it out, or anything at all, just message me
You can get through this! Be strong and keep fighting =]
-Amy


   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: urging - February 19th 2009, 09:00 PM

Hey,

Making 10 days SH free is a fantastic achomplishment! Setting goals and dates can help you stay SH free even longer especially when you're having an urge. Just think "I told myself I could make it 20 days without cutting, I'm not about to break that promise now." After you make it to that goal, set another. Just keep going and going before you know it it'll be a month or 6 months or a year, and one day you'll look back and see what a good job you did.

Check out the thread Amy placed in her reply. There's some great and creative alternatives on there. Keeping your mind and hands busy is very helpful too.

I think the best thing to do when having an urge is to talk to someone. It's best to talk about why you're urging, but you don't have to. Just getting into a conversation about school or what you're going to be doing this weekend can work wonders! Eventually you'll forget you were even trying to stay distracted. Plus you wont be alone! I don't know about you but when I have the urge to SH, I feel very alone. Probably the reason I find talking to someone so appealing.

If you can convince yourself that "One more cut wont make a difference. It's just one. This'll be the last time. I know it this time." Then you can certainly figure out that cutting is a vicious habbit and needs to be broken! Just tell yourself that you don't need it. (Because of course, you don't!) Stay convinced that things will get better. Because they always do. Life's a roller coaster of downs AND up's don't get to thinking it's just a plumet down. You'll see soon enough that things get better with effort and time!

You can PM me anytime.
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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
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Re: urging - February 19th 2009, 11:03 PM

Heya Georgia

Well done for making the decision to quit! Thats a really brave thing to do, so I congratulate you for that. 10 days is pretty good, it must have been hard for you, but you did it!

When you try to quit something, there will always be urges there, trying to lure you back into it. If you're really serious about quitting then you have to really try to take your mind off of those thoughts and focus on something else. Giving in now would just let that bad part win, think of how proud of yourself you'd be if you lasted another 10 days without hurting yourself. It IS incredibly hard, but with enough willpower, support and distraction, you can get through this and show yourself how strong you can be and fight those urges!

x
   
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