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Shanna Offline
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Should I move out? - December 16th 2010, 04:51 AM

I am cutting again after like 5 months of not cutting. I am scared of this because it might become a several times daily habit again....I just don't wanna go down that road. Where I am living now is very triggering for me and it's getting worse. I feel like they all hate me...which is probably my irrational fear kicking in, but I keep finding things that reinforce that thought. I'm not sure what to do anymore....I wanna move out because of Jon, but I don't wanna move out because I love everyone and they have all helped me out. But I don't want them to hate me.
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*Jen* Offline
keep smiling :-)
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Re: Should I move out? - December 16th 2010, 07:48 PM

Hey Shanna,

5 months without self harm is fantastic! I am wondering what helped you to get through all that time without self harm... there must have been something that helped you through the times when you really felt like self harming but did not during that time. If you are able to identify what helped you during this time then perhaps it may be able to help you now.

You say where you live is very triggering. It seems like you are having mixed feelings about whether to move out. Perhaps you could write down a list of the pros and cons of moving out, because that might make things clearer. If things are not that good at home it might be an idea to try to get out sometimes even just going for a walk to get out the house for a bit.

Stay strong.
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Shanna Offline
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Re: Should I move out? - December 18th 2010, 06:16 AM

I used God I guess...And I've been a lot happier for once....getting out of my self pity and just seeing the negative things in life. I've been seeing the good and just loving myself but sometimes I get so down and soo stressed. When I am positive and happy I am on top of the world not depressed or anything, but then all of a sudden everything changes and goes down the drain in an instant....I just don't understand...

I was diagnosed ADHD and slightly bipolar but since I've been so happy for that long I just thought it was because of all the depression and self pity...I don't know.
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Re: Should I move out? - December 18th 2010, 06:29 AM

5 months is great! If you have gone that long before you can do it again. I think it's great that you have a higher power, that helps me sometimes too. It does sound that you have the symptoms of Bipolar Disorder. Are you seeing a psychatrist or a therapist?

"Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you'll land among the stars."

"For those who don't care, for those who can't see, never give up, always thrive to be free."

Smile, you are beautiful www.operationbeautiful.com

Blessed Be!
Nicole AKA Nikki
Artist, Poet, and Future Social Worker
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