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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Metal♥Lover Offline
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Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 23rd 2010, 04:38 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Hey everyone. I hope you're all doing alot better than I am right now.

So here's my problem: Monday I was requested in the school counselor's office during 6th Period. She said that two girls came to her saying that they were concerned and that they thought I was cutting myself. So I just walked over to her office thinking Yeah right. Concerned? Hardly. Since when have two girls I don't know ever been concerned? But when I sat down in her office she told me to show her my arms. She made me do it. I was so scared, but she didn't care because she kept saying "Yes, yes, yes. Show me." I was terrified, but I showed her my arms anyway-I had no other choice. I was being forced. Then she asked me all sorts of questions, like "Why do you do this?" or "What happens in your life that makes you want to hurt yourself?" "Is anything happening at home?" "Do your parents work, have a car, etc.?" I had to tell her about my parents drinking and that neither of them work, that we don't have a car, that we live off of Food Stamps and Welfare, stuff that I just felt so humiliated sharing. It was terrible. Finally she called the principal into the office and she made me show her my arms too. Then the counselor tried calling my parents but they wouldn't answer. So that meant I had to get a ride home from the principal and the counselor. When we got to my house I was forced to show my arms to my parents. Mom started crying and I was so scared. Then I was sent to my room to get my blades and then I had to give them to my mom. They were my last two blades. I don't have anything else to break open. This is only my third day without my blades and I'm already about to explode. Cutting was my only release of pain. Now that I don't have that the pain will just keep building up and building up until I explode or snap or go insane and kill myself somehow. Please do NOT give me the alternatives list because that stuff just doesn't work, it doesn't release my pain.

So now I'm being forced to quit SH and I have no other way to get rid of this terrible emotional pain.


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Re: Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 23rd 2010, 05:08 PM

Honestly, it's good that they're making you quit. And that's coming from someone who cut for about 5 years. Cutting doesn't fix anything. It just makes things worse. It makes it so you let yourself rely on an incredibly unhealthy way of dealing with stress.

I know things are hard right now, but it really is a good thing that they're trying to get you to quit. Keep your head up, things get better
   
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Re: Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 23rd 2010, 05:15 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Myss View Post
Honestly, it's good that they're making you quit. And that's coming from someone who cut for about 5 years. Cutting doesn't fix anything. It just makes things worse. It makes it so you let yourself rely on an incredibly unhealthy way of dealing with stress.

I know things are hard right now, but it really is a good thing that they're trying to get you to quit. Keep your head up, things get better
So taking away my only means of relief from the emotional pain and not giving me anything healthy to work with is helping me? Right. And it's such a wonderful thing that now I have nothing to help me deal with this.


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Re: Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 23rd 2010, 05:50 PM

Its not the best way, to be forced, but you should try and stop. See if thres somebody you can talk to, not your school counsler. Seems too pushy... i myself dont like pushy people when it comes to something like tihs. But please try and belive you can stop. PM if you ever want to talk!


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Re: Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 23rd 2010, 06:58 PM

its only the best try something different to distract yourself the feeling will go away i know its hard i know im still trying to quit and i know its hard pm if you want feel free i will help you throu it hope you get throu it ok lots of love




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Re: Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 23rd 2010, 10:33 PM

They should NOT have made you do that. It makes me angry that they made you do that.
It is your choice.. Your release. Adults. Grr. They think they're doing you a favour when all the do is cause you shit.
You should have been offered support and then stopped on your own.
I am sorry dear.. Its absolutely awful that happened. And I am angry for you.
If that was me I would have walked out. :/
I am here to talk.. You need to stay strong .. After 2 weeks it gets easier.. Trust me
Keep going xxx




   
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Re: Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 23rd 2010, 11:19 PM

really, it is probably "better" if you have some means of stopping. I know how hard it is when somebody finds out- it's torture. I've been caught 5 times, and everyone thinks I've stopped (but I haven't).

I wish there was some encouraging thing I could say, but, I don't know 'cause I'm sort of at the same point as you right now. I really hope you're doing ok! Send a PM if you need anything

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Re: Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 23rd 2010, 11:34 PM

I am also angry for you, it should not have been dealt with in that way. Some people just don't understand what we go through with self-harm and how it makes us feel. You shouldn't have been forced to show someone your arms. I would have been traumatized if my counselor or principal acted in that way towards me. It is NOT okay. I can understand about them telling your parents but not in the way they did. I am so sorry. If you ever want to talk feel free to PM me.


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Re: Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 24th 2010, 12:52 AM

Hey April,

Im really sorry that happened to you. Almost the same thing happened to me when I as 13.

I know you don't want to hear this but it is best that you stop. Now stopping just cold turkey I don't think is the best way. I had to do that and im not going to lie it was hard. But it wasn't impossble.

Try not to let things build up. Talk about what your feeling with people, write it down, draw. I had to do things to get my mind off of cutting. I also had to think about while I know I like this I can't do it.

Finding different coping methods is a really good idea. Is there anybody that you can talk to about this? That consuler that you talked to? Now I know you may not be very happy with her but she did it to try and help you. I don't think it's right that you were forced to show her your cuts. The same thing happened to me and it was horrible. Im really sorry that happened to you. She shouldn't have done that. If you don't feel comfortable talking to her that you could try somebody else. Friends, family members anybody like that.

Hang in there you can get through this.


   
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Re: Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 24th 2010, 06:48 AM

I think that's pretty ridiculous of what they did. The same happened to me freshmen year.; although, they didn't tell my family.

But I think it's a good thing that they're making you quit... After awhile, the urges will subside. I mean, what did you do before you started SH? Find something you enjoy. That's what I did. And things might not work out the way you want them to all the time, but everything works out in the end.

But you know there are lots of people to support you when you need it.


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Re: Being Forced To Quit SH... - December 24th 2010, 03:47 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Metal♥Lover View Post
So taking away my only means of relief from the emotional pain and not giving me anything healthy to work with is helping me? Right. And it's such a wonderful thing that now I have nothing to help me deal with this.
That's what I'm saying though. That you need to find another healthy way of dealing with stress. No, what they did isn't right, but it's best that you quit, believe me.
   
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