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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Katley Offline
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Where am I going? - February 3rd 2011, 04:16 AM

So alright, life is interesting. I started cutting a bit ago, and i hate myself for that. I have to hide my wrists. Idk what to do about it anymore. I feel relief when i do it but then a few minutes after i wish i hadnt because now i have to deal with my friends. Many of them, when they found out i started, made me promise them that i would tell them when i did it, and i DONT break promises. I had a terrible day, my parents are noticing changes, in fact they banned me from a few things that i feel i need. like some of my friends. So many of my friends cut, and i feel like ive been thrown into a group that is full of messed up people, and im one of the worst of the bunch. Cuz its true, i cut, they cut, we work well together, we can support each other, but i cant help but feel this isnt who i am. Suddenly i have a label that i dont want to accept, but there it is. Label. Cutter. I need a way to get rid of this but the longer i go the more i want it. What is this addiction? why is it so addicting?

I cant have my parents finding out. i just cant. And my friends hurt when i talk about it. So there... its me. Messed up, me.
   
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Re: Where am I going? - February 3rd 2011, 03:35 PM

It's sounds like a horrible situation to be in, I'm sorry for being blunt but if you friends are influencing you to cut you need to get away from them. You need to talk to an adult you trust and tell them.
It can become addiction if you have been doing it for a long time, it feel like its the only way you can deal with things. Its not believe me, you need to try alternatives such as reading and distracting yourself, or crushing ice in your hand; the urges will start to go and will be easier to control.
It WILL take time, but you have to stay strong and keep going
Feel free to PM me if you want to talk
Take care
Charli


'Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics'



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Katley Offline
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Re: Where am I going? - February 3rd 2011, 08:58 PM

Thank you, Yeah i know what you mean. The problem would be that i love these people sooo much. And i cant go without them, but the nights when they fall apart... I fall apart. The thing is though there are the ones that understand, as they have the same issues, but then there are the ones who find it... really bad. And like... They FREAK out for me... i hate doing that to them. I keep telling myself ill do better next time, but then i find myself doing it again. UGH. Im doing better today, but i was doing REALLY badly yesterday.
   
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Re: Where am I going? - February 4th 2011, 03:34 PM

I understand what you mean, but if they're aren't helping then you know.
It's good that your doing better today, stay strong and take care
Feel free to PM me if you want to talk
Charli :-)


'Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics'



Helplink mentor 19/03/11
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Katley Offline
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Re: Where am I going? - February 7th 2011, 04:50 AM

Thanks, i think i will Id love to talk to someone actually. Im so lost uk?
   
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Riddikulus Offline
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Re: Where am I going? - February 7th 2011, 03:33 PM

Pm me, i don't mind talking :-)


'Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics'



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RIP Peter <3
   
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