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Unhappy Oops. - February 8th 2011, 06:09 AM

Last night I almost SH but, I didn't. I sat there with knife in my hand and didn't do it.
Tonight was actually a good night. I was happy. Except for the fact that I was a little sad that I gave into my porn addiction.
But I ended up cutting. and I accidentally went a little deeper than normal. i always carve words into my legs when I SH and this time it was "ADDICT". I don't want this to scar. I don't want this to be shown to the world. I don't want to live my life with this on my skin! It will fade, I know that. But I can't decide if it's a horrible reminder like my "Never Win" scar or a great reminder like my "Move On" scar. I guess maybe a little of both? I don't know.
But I can't believe I gave in. After spending all night talking to friends about how I need to stop. I'm pathetic.
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Re: Oops. - February 8th 2011, 01:45 PM

Hey there,

You are far from pathetic, we all have slip-up's they are not the end of the world! I promise! I have them, I guarentee if you ask anyone on this site that has self harmed, they will tell you they have too. Just look at this as, a new start. Try tracking how long you make it and each time you mess up, try to break that record. Try using alternatives when you want to cut.

Keep your chin held high!
PM me if you need anything!!
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Re: Oops. - February 8th 2011, 07:13 PM

i agree with trish. also, dont let yourself ever give up on quitting. keep trying and trying, even if you have slip ups over and over again, just keep trying. the more you try the more you will suceed.
Don't feel pathetic because you cut, feel strong because you are trying.
also, if you dont want there to be as much of a scar this time put that antibactieral ointment stuff on it, the neosporin its called, it makes a HUGE difference, then after the cut is healed try the mederma scar lotion stuff. this will make it A LOT less noticable later on. there will probably still be somewhat of a scar but it wont be nearly as bad.

We do not fear death, we fear that no one will notice our absence. That we will disappear without a trace.
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