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ItalianBbae Offline
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can i just say fml? - February 11th 2011, 10:08 PM

so i came home from college for the weekend and my mom asked if i had cut again since she found out, 2 weeks ago. i said no i hadnt then she asked if she could see them. i told her no and but she wouldnt take that for an answer. luckily i convinced her there were only cuts on my arm not stomach so i didnt have to show those ones too, but when she saw the ones on my arm she knew i lied about not cutting in two weeks. like seriously? why cant i catch a break? she wasnt mad but i could tell she was very upset. i dont tell my family for this reason. this is so stupid. why cant anything stay between me myself and i anymore?
   
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Re: can i just say fml? - February 11th 2011, 10:32 PM

Hey there,

Sometimes it's hard to keep things from your family members, especially from your mom. Mom's more then anyone worry about their children and their well being and so your mother is simply showing her concern for you. I know you want to keep it to yourself and it's hard when people find out something you don't want them to, especially SH. I would suggest sitting down and having a mature discussion with your mother, explain your feelings to her and ask if she can back off a little. Maybe even let her know that if things get any worse you will seek help or let her know. A little reassurance can go a long way!


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Re: can i just say fml? - February 11th 2011, 11:00 PM

This is why I'm very hesitant to tell my family about my cutting. I don't want to talk about it with them and I don't want them to ask to see my scars.
maybe you should sit down with your mom and expplain to her that you need her to not ask about your self harm or to see your cuts and tell her that you need to work through this on your own without her budding in.


We do not fear death, we fear that no one will notice our absence. That we will disappear without a trace.
   
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Re: can i just say fml? - February 11th 2011, 11:04 PM

yea we had the heart to heart a few weeks about when she first found out and i promised her i wouldnt do it anymore. i broke that promise and was upset. :/ and things shouldnt get worse. im going to therapy 2moro
   
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Re: can i just say fml? - February 11th 2011, 11:06 PM

Well the therapy should help. I hope it goes well.


We do not fear death, we fear that no one will notice our absence. That we will disappear without a trace.
   
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Re: can i just say fml? - February 12th 2011, 02:35 AM

thanks me too haha. and idk i dont think my mom will not ask to see them because when i tried saying no shes like i just want to make sure their okay and not infected (cuz shes a nurse) but idk. i really dont want to do it again sooo im hoping i hope have another situation like this
   
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Re: can i just say fml? - February 12th 2011, 03:16 AM

Hey Erika.

It sounds like your mum's just trying to help. Have you considered talking to her about it? Not just about the fact that you do it, but maybe about why, or how she can help you stop. It can be hard for people to find out somebody they love is deliberately hurting themselves, and they may not be sure how to help. If you give her clear ideas on what you want and what she can do, it may help sort things out.

You could also try striking some kind of a deal with her. For example, if you cut, you'll tell her/show her, but only if she doesn't ask too many questions. Or something like that. I'd really suggest trying to talk it through with her. That might make things easier on both of you.

Good luck.


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Re: can i just say fml? - February 12th 2011, 03:24 AM

i think my problem is that idk what my trigger is to be able to tell her what she can do to stop. :/
   
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Re: can i just say fml? - February 12th 2011, 03:34 AM

If you're not sure what triggers you, work to find it out. Next time you feel the urge to self harm, stop a minute and think about it. How are you feeling? When did you start feeling like this? What's happened recently that may have caused you to feel this way? Or even think back to other times you've self harmed, and try and remember why you felt the need to do it.


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Re: can i just say fml? - February 13th 2011, 06:04 AM

It sounds like you mom is just concerned about you, and it's good that you have a mom that is concerned. I honestly don't reccommend to promise to someone that you will never self-harm again because I know I can't keep that promise and when I break a promise it makes me feel so bad. Figuriing out your triggers is a HUGE step in helping you to stop, so working on doing that is very important but until then you could tell your mom that your cutting is something that is very difficult to talk about but that you will be sure to discuss it with your therapist.


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Re: can i just say fml? - February 13th 2011, 06:05 AM

It sounds like you mom is just concerned about you, and it's good that you have a mom that is concerned. I honestly don't reccommend to promise to someone that you will never self-harm again because I know I can't keep that promise and when I break a promise it makes me feel so bad. Figuriing out your triggers is a HUGE step in helping you to stop, so working on doing that is very important but until then you could tell your mom that your cutting is something that is very difficult to talk about but that you will be sure to discuss it with your therapist.


"Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you'll land among the stars."

"For those who don't care, for those who can't see, never give up, always thrive to be free."

Smile, you are beautiful www.operationbeautiful.com

Blessed Be!
Nicole AKA Nikki
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