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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Lili Offline
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Exclamation Family Found Out - February 19th 2011, 02:03 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

So my friend told me a week ago that she wanted to commit suicide but then after days of freaking out and talking to people about it she told me that it was just for attention. Then my ex started flirting with me even though i want to get over him. After all that happened in one day i get home and my dad starts acting like an asshole. So i go to my room and i see the scissors. I was so lost and i made the first cut i have made in four years. Today my parents found out as well as my sister. How do i face them? My sister is so mad at me and my mom is very upset. My father hasn't really reacted yet. I feel like cutting again even though i know it wont help anything. What should i do?
   
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Re: Family Found Out - February 19th 2011, 03:32 AM

Well, for one, you should be proud of yourself that you went four years without hurting yourself. That's amazing.

Second, don't cut again, you're right, that would definitely make things worse.

Third, just wait till things calm down a bit. In my experience, trying to talk about this stuff when its so fresh in your parents minds is a bad idea and only makes things worse. When mine found out, I just let them calm down so I could have a mature conversation about it, so that my parents could actually understand why I hurt myself. Trying to talk right now might lead to yelling/fighting which isn't something anyone needs to deal with.

Good luck =]
   
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Re: Family Found Out - February 19th 2011, 10:11 AM

Hey,
It is brillant that your have gone four years well done. :-)
I think you have to ask yourself do you really want to start SH again; you have done so well, you don't want to relapse. As said above, let your parents calm down, then talk to them, explain to them why this has happened and they can help you through.
Feel free to PM me if you want to talk,
Take care and stay strong :-)


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RIP Peter <3
   
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Re: Family Found Out - February 20th 2011, 03:06 AM

My sister is so mad at me right now. I tried to talk to her about why i started cutting but she blew me off and said that it was obvious. Either i was suicidal or i wanted attention. I tried to explain that it wasn't that simple but its like hitting a brick wall. It hurts that she is so mad at me and i am considering continuing. It would make me feel so much better
   
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Re: Family Found Out - February 20th 2011, 05:26 AM

Hey Lianna.

I know it can be hard to deal with people who, for whatever reason, refuse to listen. It can be hard for people to realise that someone close to them is hurting themselves, and, to deal with that, they may try and ignore the problem, or try to brush it off. This doesn't mean that your sister doesn't love you. She's only mad because she cares about you. It might be wise to give her a bit of time to let her deal with it in her own way. Or you could try printing off a pamphlet about self harm - something simple and quick to read - and letting her look at it.

Just remember that the relief you feel when you self harm is only temporary. The bad feelings that come after - confusion, guilt, anger - last longer. You've already said that you know self harm won't solve anything, and that's completey right. Finding healthy alternatives, like these, can really help.

Dealing with the problem is the best way to go about it, rather than creating new problems, which is what happens when you self harm. Know that you are better than this, and you can get through it.

Good luck.


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Re: Family Found Out - February 20th 2011, 09:13 AM

Hey, as said above, it is hard when people don't listen. You sister cares about you, she is probably really worried and doesn't know how to deal with it.
Selfharming again won't solve anything, As Pshychic Crisis said, the relief is only temporary, and it causes problems afterwards. Give your family a bit of time to come to terms with it, and then try speaking to them again, or write them a letter?
Feel free to PM me if you want to talk,
Take care :-)


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RIP Peter <3
   
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