Support Forums Today's Posts Chat Room

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!

Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

Closed Thread
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rate Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
ItalianBbae Offline
Not a n00b
ItalianBbae's Avatar
Name: Erika
Age: 29
Gender: Female

Posts: 98
Join Date: June 19th 2010

Still Hiding Scars - March 7th 2011, 03:28 AM

My family found out about my s/h like a month and a half ago. In theory shouldn't this mean that I shouldn't have to hide my scars anymore? But I still do. And if any of them try to ask me about it or ask if therapy is helping I still give them short annoyed answers because I just don't want to talk to them about it. It's like I want them to forget that they know and just never talk about it, and I don't want to see them looking at my scars if I don't hide them.

Yet what confuses me is that I don't hide my scars from friends and I will talk to one of my friends about it if they ask. I just don't understand what the difference is.....:/
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Epoh Offline
Love is in the tiniest places.
Not a n00b
Epoh's Avatar
Name: Judith
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Location: Your heart

Posts: 59
Join Date: October 7th 2010

Re: Still Hiding Scars - March 7th 2011, 03:43 AM

Hey Erika. First of all, just because someone knows about your sh, doesn't mean that you are required to keep it out in the open. It seems like something personal with you, and just because they know, doesn't mean they always have to see it. So no, you can still hide them. It's your choice.

Secondly, family and friends are two different groups of people. Some people find it easier to talk to their friends and visa versa. It isn't strange at all that you are more comfortable around your friends. You probably trust them more to not judge you or try to change you.

Last edited by Epoh; March 7th 2011 at 03:45 AM. Reason: spelling mistake
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Tonight Offline
Average Joe
Tonight's Avatar
Age: 29
Gender: Female

Posts: 132
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: January 11th 2009

Re: Still Hiding Scars - March 7th 2011, 05:26 AM

I'm the same way.My mom found out over a year ago and if I could still wear my arm warmers and cuffs/bracelettes I still would.I hate talking to my mom about it and at first she would ask to see just to make sure I wasn't doing it anymore but she relized it was just making things worse and me more uncomfortable.She eventually stopped asking to see and talking about it

You wonder why I never smile anymore,but with broken homes come broken smiles.

Has the acidic rain burned a hole so deep,that we don't care what's beneath our feet?

I'm a freak and my best friend is a pirate-ninja-dinosaur,what a unique friendship!

My heart is so numb,that I can't feel it breaking

  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Blair Offline
Regular TeenHelper
Blair's Avatar
Name: Blair
Age: 25
Gender: Chick
Location: This moment

Posts: 491
Blog Entries: 13
Join Date: December 7th 2010

Re: Still Hiding Scars - March 7th 2011, 01:57 PM

Erika, just because they know now doesn't mean it isn't still personal to you. It's understandable that you don't want your cuts and scars seen. I think the difference is your family has known you forever and your parents knew you as a baby. They feel more protective of you and see you differently than your friends do so it's more difficult for them to handle it. Your friends are also able to relate better for the most part. You can absolutely get through all this though and it's good that you've got help around if you need it. Just remember that although your cutting is personal and private when you want it to be, it's nothing you've gotta be ashamed of ok <3

Just Keep Breathing
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
ItalianBbae Offline
Not a n00b
ItalianBbae's Avatar
Name: Erika
Age: 29
Gender: Female

Posts: 98
Join Date: June 19th 2010

Re: Still Hiding Scars - March 8th 2011, 03:14 AM

i think that has something to do with it. im not ashamed of it around my friends but i think like around my family i am because i feel like ive disappointed them :/
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
Horsefeathers. Offline
Walk through the fire.
TeenHelp Addict
Horsefeathers.'s Avatar
Name: Charlie
Gender: Absent
Location: Hellmouth

Posts: 9,321
Blog Entries: 81
Join Date: September 20th 2009

Re: Still Hiding Scars - March 8th 2011, 07:01 AM

Hey Erika.

I'm actually the same way. I'm a lot more open about my self harm around my friends. I haven't self harmed in months, and my family knows that, but I still always keep my scars covered. I still feel self-conscious about it, I suppose. And I do feel a lot more comfortable talking about this sort of thing with my friends.

Just because someone knows about your self harm doesn't mean you have to feel okay talking about it with them, or that you have to show them your scars. Have you tried sitting down and having a talk with them? You could try explaining that you appreciate their care for you, but that this is something you don't feel comfortable talking about. Let them know how they can best help you, because chances are that's all they want.

Why exactly do you feel like you've disappointed your family? Because, I can assure you, you haven't. You've gone through a hard time, coped with it (admittedly with a less-than-healthy method), and tried to deal with it. That doesn't mean you've let anyone down.

Take care.

throw yourself into the unknown
with pace & a fury defiant.

  (#7 (permalink)) Old
ItalianBbae Offline
Not a n00b
ItalianBbae's Avatar
Name: Erika
Age: 29
Gender: Female

Posts: 98
Join Date: June 19th 2010

Re: Still Hiding Scars - March 9th 2011, 01:00 AM

idk why i feel like that, i think i just have this weird mind telling me that i need to be perfect for them :/, even though i know this isnt an imperfection in our lives but idk. its just awkward. :/
Closed Thread


hiding, scars

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

All material copyright 1998-2020, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints | Mobile

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2021, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.