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I'm such an idiot - March 26th 2011, 12:57 AM

I'm been feeling down again lately. I thought I was happy, but now the darkness is starting to shadow me again. One night I was really feeling low. And because of the idiot I am, I cut myself again. Then I did so again last night. I'm so stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I just made it worse. I can remove the self-harm free on my signature. I cut my legs instead of my arms now, so no one can see the cuts. I didn't tell anyone and I'm not going too. All I've been doing for the past 6 months is making everyone feel like shit right along with me. My best friend, my family have all been worried because of me. Everyone would be so much happier without me. They wouldn't have to worry. So I'm just going to pretend like everything's fine and never tell anyone. So they don't have to worry about me anymore. Because I'm not worth it.


   
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Re: I'm such an idiot - March 26th 2011, 01:18 AM

Shelby, you're not stupid. Cutting has nothing to do with your intellect. It doesn't mean you're ba or wrong or stupid or weak or anything like that. It just means you're hurt and a little lost. And that's not something you should get down on yourself for. Although different people handle emotions differently, you're not the only one who feels how you do or who copes how you do. You're learning to be gentle with yourself and to deal with your emotions in a more constructive way but that doesn't mean all of it will work out in one try. You'll slip sometimes but you can get back up and keep going


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Re: I'm such an idiot - March 26th 2011, 01:26 AM

Hey there,

I agree with Blair. Just because you are going through a hard time right now, this does not effect how smart you are. Instead of looking at the fact that you failed and did not continue to remain SH free, why don't you look at it like this? "I might have messed up this time, but I will not mess up again." If you set a goal for yourself then you have a better chance of succeeding.

As far as your self worth, you are worth more then you can ever imagine. You just don't know it yet. I hope you feel better. If you want, feel free to PM me. I would love to talk with you. Good Luck!

Angelica


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