Triggering: Self Harm

[figureskater09]

Hello I'm new to this kind of thing ive been cutting on and off for 7years now and the longest ive been able to stop is 4months and ive never been able to do that again the longest i can go without cutting is a few days or weeks I've just been diagnosed with a new illness which doesnt help as ive been cutting more since the news. i was diagnosed with Emotionally unstable personality disorder also known as Borderline. Im just lost right now and really dont know what to do or even know if i want to stop cutting for good im soo confusesed please help x

[Thirteen]

Hey Tiffany,

I've been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder) myself, so I can understand how you feel.

How about, you can feel free to PM me if you wish...? Since you're new here, I'll tell you how to PM somebody, actually.

You'll notice when you click on a username, it'll give you a menu of options. The 2nd one in the list is to Private Message the user. So if you want to send me a message, that only you and I will see, go right ahead.

I usually respond pretty quickly, unless I'm doing chores, or with my boyfriend. So if I don't reply right away, don't feel discouraged. Though if you PM any time soon, I'll be online for at least the next bit.

[Reverie.]

Tiffany,

First off, welcome to TH. I'm Hollie, a buddy, so you're welcome to PM me with any concerns you have about literally anything at all.

I'm sorry you've been going though such a rough time these few years, but things can and will get better. 4 months is a long time, and you can deffinatly do it again, and stop completly. You just need to stay strong. I understand that being diagnosed with this illness is going to push you back a bit, but it doesn't make anything impossible. It will make it harder, I understand, but you can still do it. If you havn't already, I'd advise you to look at the SH alternatives that the site has to offer by clicking here: http://www.teenhelp.org/alternatives. It's unlikely that they will all work for you, but you'll doubtlessly find at least one that does.

Cutting doesn't actually help with anything. The more you do it, the more addictive it will become, but if you can stop, with time it will get easier to fight the urges. You're a strong person, and if you tell yourself this, you will be able to over come things. Try to distract yourself when you have urges. Scars and cuts don't look nice, and surely you don't want them there.

Also, if you havn't already, tell someone that you're struggling. If you let people know you need help, you will get help. It's a very good idea to tell the people you love about it before you feel too bad to.

If you ever want to chat, you're free to PM me. I'll always do my best to help you out and give you some advice. Take care and keep your chin up. <3

[figureskater09]

Hey Julz Thanks soo much for repplying to my thingy its soo nice to meet someone who has the same diagnosis as me im all new to it so i dont really know much about it but ive ordered 2 books so that should help Also you can always PM me to anyway thanks look forward to getting to know you :] take care

Tiffany (figureskater09)

[figureskater09]

Hello Hollie thank you soo much I will check out that website you gave me and see if i can use anything from it.

Thanks again

Tiffany (figureskater09)

[TheCrowing]

I can't 100% say I know how you feel with Borderline.. but it was hard for me when my doctor/therapist at the time diagnosed me with severe depression and an anxiety disorder. I, too, have been struggling for a long time. Six and a half years of struggling for me. At this moment, I'm at 6 months clean and honestly, it feels great.

You should be proud of your 4 month accomplishment. SH is not an easy thing to fight, but use this new diagnosis as motivation to overcome SH. Show yourself that you are much stronger than you give yourself credit for. It may feel as if you don't want to stop, but you came to the right place, and perhaps somewhere deep down there is a part of you that really wants to stop. The thing that works best for me? Gradually stop. You say you can't go for a few days or weeks.. So.. set up a plan. Let's say that at this moment, you can go a week without cutting and then you slip up. Push yourself to wait two or three weeks before another slip up. Then four. Or go by days. I personally had a negative experience with counseling and therapy, but if it helps you, that's great. We're all different.

It may be hard at first, but stopping feels wonderful. It's like.. having proof that you are strong. Proof of being free. Only you can stop yourself from doing or not doing something. Find that one thing that motivates you, stick with it, and end the cycle. It took five years for me to finally want to break the cycle, and sure, I feel some of the worst urges I've felt in years, but when I am able to get over it without turning to SH, I get this new surge of happiness and energy. I realize that I shouldn't be punishing myself for being alive, I should be celebrating the fact that I am still alive.