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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 01:34 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Not sure if this is triggering; so tagged in case. :/ I just don't know if I can keep putting it off.

I haven't cut in...well a while. I'm not sure how long exactly. But things have gotten bad again. I really want to cut. To the point it feels like a need. Like I just need to hurt myself, even if to make me feel better for just a while.

I hate it.

I shouldn't have to cut myself to feel better. I know that. But at the same time, I don't care.

My friend I haven't seen in a long time is staying at my house. I'm glad to see her. But, it's also made me want to cut even more. My parents have been happy since she's been here. In a good mood. As soon as she leaves, so will the decent mood.

At the same time they've been in a good mood, it probably has to do with the fact they've been making fun of me the whole time. And sure, they may have been "kidding". But it doesn't make it hurt any less.

At this point, I just don't know what to do. The butterfly project might help, but I don't think I could take people questioning it. Plus I feel like it'd just draw attention to my scars. I've tried some of the other alternatives here, but I still haven't found anything that works more than once or twice.

Does anyone have suggestions from other sites/personal experiences? It'd be extremely helpful. :/


♪♫"The mirror only shows
The shell of what's below
You can't go on suffering
The illusion of control
It's time for letting go
You can't go on suffering
And now you know
Now you know"♪♫
'Now You Know' - 2Cents
Things get better.
Always keep fighting.
❤Feel free to PM/VM, or add me if you ever need a friend, or someone to talk to. I'm online quite often.
Add me on FB <--- apparently this is my creeper face.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 01:43 AM

Hey Nikki.

First off, well done on not cutting in a while. It sounds like you've really wanted to, but you haven't, which is good.

Next, I'd like to link you to TeenHelp's own alternatives thread, here. Not all will work for you, but some should; it's just a matter of finding out which ones do, and then using them.

I think it might help to write a list of why you haven't self harmed for a while, and/or why you shouldn't self harm. For example, the awkward questions people ask if they notice, the guilt you feel if you have to lie about it, the possibility of complications from you hurting yourself... and so on and so forth.

Another important point is one you brought up yourself - self harm makes you feel better for a little while. It doesn't solve any problems, and it's not a long term solution. It's much better to deal with the underlying issues than use self harm to hide from them.

Anyway. I really hope things go well for you.

Take care, and stay safe.


let no science fix our path
if only numbers make its math.
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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 02:41 AM

I always set a goal, and reward myself with something small each time I reach my goal. And at each goal, I increase it. So go a week or two, and if you can make it without it, increase the goal to an extra 3 weeks, then an extra 4 weeks. etc.

It's worked for me for the past 2 years.


"Although only breath, words which I command are immortal." Sappho

"Sometimes I feel nothing at all. Sometimes I feel everything is my fault.
Sometimes I feel the hate break my mind. Sometimes I feel they deserve it this time.
May the bridges I burn light my way." - I, Alone - Otep

   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 04:57 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sidhe. View Post
Hey Nikki.

First off, well done on not cutting in a while. It sounds like you've really wanted to, but you haven't, which is good.

Next, I'd like to link you to TeenHelp's own alternatives thread, here. Not all will work for you, but some should; it's just a matter of finding out which ones do, and then using them.

I think it might help to write a list of why you haven't self harmed for a while, and/or why you shouldn't self harm. For example, the awkward questions people ask if they notice, the guilt you feel if you have to lie about it, the possibility of complications from you hurting yourself... and so on and so forth.

Another important point is one you brought up yourself - self harm makes you feel better for a little while. It doesn't solve any problems, and it's not a long term solution. It's much better to deal with the underlying issues than use self harm to hide from them.

Anyway. I really hope things go well for you.

Take care, and stay safe.
Thanks for replying, it means a lot.

The alternatives list on here I've gone through about halfway...and some of it has worked...for a few days. Now it stops working after two or three days. :/

Thanks for the list suggestion; I'll definitely have to try that.

Again, thanks so much for replying.


♪♫"The mirror only shows
The shell of what's below
You can't go on suffering
The illusion of control
It's time for letting go
You can't go on suffering
And now you know
Now you know"♪♫
'Now You Know' - 2Cents
Things get better.
Always keep fighting.
❤Feel free to PM/VM, or add me if you ever need a friend, or someone to talk to. I'm online quite often.
Add me on FB <--- apparently this is my creeper face.
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 05:00 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheCrowing View Post
I always set a goal, and reward myself with something small each time I reach my goal. And at each goal, I increase it. So go a week or two, and if you can make it without it, increase the goal to an extra 3 weeks, then an extra 4 weeks. etc.

It's worked for me for the past 2 years.
Thanks for replying, and for the suggestion. I'll definately have to try this. Never would have thought of it on my own; I tend to overlook things like this


♪♫"The mirror only shows
The shell of what's below
You can't go on suffering
The illusion of control
It's time for letting go
You can't go on suffering
And now you know
Now you know"♪♫
'Now You Know' - 2Cents
Things get better.
Always keep fighting.
❤Feel free to PM/VM, or add me if you ever need a friend, or someone to talk to. I'm online quite often.
Add me on FB <--- apparently this is my creeper face.
   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 07:35 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Intoxicated Brutality View Post
Thanks for replying, it means a lot.

The alternatives list on here I've gone through about halfway...and some of it has worked...for a few days. Now it stops working after two or three days. :/

Thanks for the list suggestion; I'll definitely have to try that.

Again, thanks so much for replying.
The list is kind of huge, so I get that it might take a while.

For me, I like to mix it up. If I use the same distraction too frequently, then it starts to lose its effect, so I like to switch it up. For example, today I've been writing, last week I used used ice to simulate the shock of self harm (but without actually hurting myself), and the week before I went for a run.

I hope you find ones that work for you.

You're welcome to PM me anytime. Good luck!


let no science fix our path
if only numbers make its math.
🎕
   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 05:14 PM

Congratulations on staying away from SH for a while! That's really good. (:

Like Sidhe said above, you proabbly want to check out the list that they have here. My personal favorite from that list is to: dare yourself not to self-harm every 15 minutes (sometimes I change it to 20 or 30 though) and keep on doing that until the urge goes away.

And of course you can do other things to, simple things like: watching TV, listening to music, reading. Just things that will get your mind off of self harm. I find that when I go out with friends it really distracts me so that could allso really help.

There is a site, that I sort of skimmed through with alternatives to self-harm, too: and it's http://www.bibri.com/selfinjuryifo/sivaltn.htm. Personally, I don't feel number 2 is a good option because someone might want to keep their hands in cold water until it hurts, but as long as you do it just to kind of shock you, it's ok.

If you ever need someone to talk to/rant about cutting, or anything in general feel free to PM me!

Hope I Helped,
Scarlett Rose

x


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  (#8 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 08:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Intoxicated Brutality View Post
Thanks for replying, and for the suggestion. I'll definately have to try this. Never would have thought of it on my own; I tend to overlook things like this
Of course. It doesn't hurt to try. There's definitely something out there that will help you.. It just takes some time to find it. Not everyone is the same, so not every way of dealing with SH is the same.


"Although only breath, words which I command are immortal." Sappho

"Sometimes I feel nothing at all. Sometimes I feel everything is my fault.
Sometimes I feel the hate break my mind. Sometimes I feel they deserve it this time.
May the bridges I burn light my way." - I, Alone - Otep

   
  (#9 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 10:12 PM

I used to cover my hands in wet glue, and once it drys try and peel it all off. Make a little game of it too, see how much you can peel off in one piece.
Works to keep yourself from picking hangnails too.

Best of luck.
   
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 11:07 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sidhe. View Post


The list is kind of huge, so I get that it might take a while.

For me, I like to mix it up. If I use the same distraction too frequently, then it starts to lose its effect, so I like to switch it up. For example, today I've been writing, last week I used used ice to simulate the shock of self harm (but without actually hurting myself), and the week before I went for a run.

I hope you find ones that work for you.

You're welcome to PM me anytime. Good luck!
Yeah I've been picking through it slowly haha

That's what I've been trying to do, and some of them have worked for like one or two times after I tried them, and then they stop working. Like if I did alternative A, then B, then C, then went back to A because it did work, it's harder to stay focused on alternative A because it isn't working as well? If that makes sense I guess I just have to keep trying something new each time

Thanks again! <3 I really appreciate it


♪♫"The mirror only shows
The shell of what's below
You can't go on suffering
The illusion of control
It's time for letting go
You can't go on suffering
And now you know
Now you know"♪♫
'Now You Know' - 2Cents
Things get better.
Always keep fighting.
❤Feel free to PM/VM, or add me if you ever need a friend, or someone to talk to. I'm online quite often.
Add me on FB <--- apparently this is my creeper face.
   
  (#11 (permalink)) Old
Theres always someone. <3
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 11:11 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Disastrously Rose View Post
Congratulations on staying away from SH for a while! That's really good. (:

Like Sidhe said above, you proabbly want to check out the list that they have here. My personal favorite from that list is to: dare yourself not to self-harm every 15 minutes (sometimes I change it to 20 or 30 though) and keep on doing that until the urge goes away.

And of course you can do other things to, simple things like: watching TV, listening to music, reading. Just things that will get your mind off of self harm. I find that when I go out with friends it really distracts me so that could allso really help.

There is a site, that I sort of skimmed through with alternatives to self-harm, too: and it's http://www.bibri.com/selfinjuryifo/sivaltn.htm. Personally, I don't feel number 2 is a good option because someone might want to keep their hands in cold water until it hurts, but as long as you do it just to kind of shock you, it's ok.

If you ever need someone to talk to/rant about cutting, or anything in general feel free to PM me!

Hope I Helped,
Scarlett Rose

x
Thanks for the reply! and the site link; I'll bookmark that so I can find it later. I hadn't tried the daring yourself trick, I'll have to try that one.
Thanks again!


♪♫"The mirror only shows
The shell of what's below
You can't go on suffering
The illusion of control
It's time for letting go
You can't go on suffering
And now you know
Now you know"♪♫
'Now You Know' - 2Cents
Things get better.
Always keep fighting.
❤Feel free to PM/VM, or add me if you ever need a friend, or someone to talk to. I'm online quite often.
Add me on FB <--- apparently this is my creeper face.
   
  (#12 (permalink)) Old
Theres always someone. <3
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Re: I need alternatives :/ - June 28th 2011, 11:15 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheCrowing View Post
Of course. It doesn't hurt to try. There's definitely something out there that will help you.. It just takes some time to find it. Not everyone is the same, so not every way of dealing with SH is the same.
True...sometimes it's just hard to remember that. Thanks again!



Quote:
Originally Posted by sleeping'in'a'submarine. View Post
I used to cover my hands in wet glue, and once it drys try and peel it all off. Make a little game of it too, see how much you can peel off in one piece.
Works to keep yourself from picking hangnails too.

Best of luck.
I've tried that one before too, but never made it out to be like a game. Maybe that'll make it work better next time I need an alternative. Thanks so much!


♪♫"The mirror only shows
The shell of what's below
You can't go on suffering
The illusion of control
It's time for letting go
You can't go on suffering
And now you know
Now you know"♪♫
'Now You Know' - 2Cents
Things get better.
Always keep fighting.
❤Feel free to PM/VM, or add me if you ever need a friend, or someone to talk to. I'm online quite often.
Add me on FB <--- apparently this is my creeper face.
   
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