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TheCrowing Offline
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Name: Courtney
Age: 26
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Location: Where Brooklyn at?!

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Let Down - July 7th 2011, 06:25 AM

So I did it. I said I wouldn't. I don't feel like I'm letting myself down very much, because I knew it was going to happen. I feel more or less like I'm letting down all of the people on here that I always preach to.

And honestly, I'm sorry.

I feel terrible knowing that I tell people all the time that they can overcome it because I did.. but I guess I didn't really overcome it.

It feels like everything is collapsing in on me. I can't stop thinking about my ex's suicide 6 years ago, or all of those little things that have happened to me over the years, or the fact that my 4 year relationship is failing and there's someone else getting in the way of it. I can't stop thinking about the feeling of failure. Of never being good enough. I know I'm better than this. I'm so much stronger than this.. but I guess I've hit my low again. It takes a lot for me to reach this point.. but when I hit it.. I hit it hard. It sucks.

I stopped for a little over a year, and only within the past 8 months did it start back up again.

Here's to trying to reclaim myself and trying again.

"Although only breath, words which I command are immortal." Sappho

"Sometimes I feel nothing at all. Sometimes I feel everything is my fault.
Sometimes I feel the hate break my mind. Sometimes I feel they deserve it this time.
May the bridges I burn light my way." - I, Alone - Otep

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Katley Offline
<3 <3 </3 <3
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Re: Let Down - July 7th 2011, 07:02 AM

I will pray for you, i know you have strength in you, and you can reach it again. Just keep trying, cause you WILL get there. Dont feel bad, because the fact that you have fallen may help others know that falling doesnt mean you are done forever. Falling means that you are ready to get back up again and be twice as strong.


Just rise above this
Kill them with your kindness
Ignorance is blindness
They're the ones that stand to lose

'Cause they don't even know you
All they see is SCARS
They don't see the ANGEL
Living in your heart
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Kristen♡ Offline
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Re: Let Down - July 13th 2011, 08:58 PM

Good luck, I have faith in you!

I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons.
And maybe we’ll never know most of them.
But even if we don’t have the power to choose where we come from,
we can still choose where we go from there.
We can still do things. And we can try to feel okay about them.

Colyn Riley ♥
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