I Cut Myself Again. . .

[CaughtInMyHead]

I hadn't cut myself in about two months, then last night I screwed everything up and cut again. I was really upset, I was thinking back on all my mistakes and how I hurt so many people who meant a lot to me. I was in the shower and I was just so sad, angry, fed up, and I got the nail clippers off my bathroom counter. Then I cut myself twelve times in my left arm, I hardly bleed at all. They were all just deep scratchs, for some reason (unlike before) I couldn't make myself really bleed. Which is a good thing. But the point is I freaked out and did again. I'm just ashamed of myself.
What do I do? Do you guys know any tricks that work when you feel like cutting? If you have gone through then your advice I how you're managing or got by would be extremely helpful!

Thanks so much

[CristinaAbigail]

Hey my name is Cristina, I am in the same situation as you. I've cut myself before and I have last night. I just think about what everybody says about how "why would people cut themselves", It's like they have no idea and I really didn't feel like there was anybody else like me that has done the same. But my advice for you is to just keep trying even when you feel like doing it again step a foot back breathe walk back and forth if that helps think about ALL of the people who love you.

[CaughtInMyHead]

I'm sorry you went through this too, and thank you much for giving your support. It means a lot and I will try what you suggested. Thanks

[Palmolive]

Hey there.

I'm really sorry that you had a rough night. Although I want you to know recovery in self harm isn't about just stopping. It's not about the slip ups either, its all about picking yourself back up after the slip ups. We all have them, you just have to keep going and don't give in.

Something I currently find quite helpful is to get some glow sticks and snap them when you feel you have urges. You're not allowed to cut yourself until the glowing has stopped in which that time the urges should have gone away.

I hope this helps a little. Stay strong.
Jessie.

[jaii]

yes, it was a temprary lapse of judgement, but if you need hhelp then get it, parents, counciler, therapist, somebody will help, and it seems like you may need it, (excuse me if im wrong)

[Ellie]

Hey there, first of all well done for not cutting in those two months! That's such a huge achievement and something to be really proud of. Yes, you slipped up last night but that's what it was. That achievement still stands. When I first started trying to stop cutting every time I cut I felt as though I was back where I started, I almost questioned what was the point of trying again if I ended up in the place I had started. But someone said I wasn't in the same place. I'd shown myself that I could go however long I had without hurting. So in your situation, you've shown you can go those two whole months. You've shown you have that strength, that courage, that determination and that bravery.

I think when trying to find either an alternaive or a distraction to hurting yourself it helps to look at what you gain from cutting. For some people it's the pain, for some people it's seeing the blood. Once you're aware of what it is that you're wanting you can look for an alternative that gives you a similar release but that doesn't hurt in the same way. So, imagine it was the blood you liked seeing, try drawing on yourself where you would normally cut in red pen or red food colouring. If it was the pain, try squeezing an ice cube or pinging an elastic band against your skin. Does that make sense?

You say you're ashamed but you posted and asked for that help which isn't something to be ashamed of. You're doing really well and you can fight through this.

[Bubbles37]

Try this list of alternatives. I found some of them to be pretty helpful.