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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
pixiesticks Offline
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Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 9th 2011, 05:01 AM

Do you guys remember some of the reasons behind certain scars? I do and it's annoying sometimes.

Like three on my leg are from one time I was super angry at my dad for a certain reason, and I just cut. And I can remember everything because I see proof.

And a few days ago when I let some random guy be my first kiss, I cut deeper than I had in a while, and I know it'll leave at least two noticable scars. And I don't want it to. Cause then I'll have to look at my arm and I'll see those two cuts and it'll take me back to that moment and those exact feelings and I'll feel gross all over again :/

With most of my scars, they're just there and I don't remember actually doing those particular cuts - but sometimes, if I remember, it really bothers me. Like it's a constant reminder of what you did wrong.

I don't know, I guess I just wanted to know if anyone really felt the same way about certain scars?


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 9th 2011, 05:15 AM

Yes, actually I do remember some of the scars and the exact reason I did them. I don't remember all of them because there is far too many but the ones I do remember do cause more emotional pain because it's bringing up everything all over again.


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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 9th 2011, 06:32 AM

Yup, I remember lots of them but the one stuck in my mind right now is where I carved the word 'hate' into my arm... That was the time when someone told I was worthless, and I had no talent what-so-ever when it comes to riding(I'm a equestrian)


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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 9th 2011, 10:31 AM

I do remember some of the scars, but not all of them. Most of them are about stupid reasons that I can't keep track of, except when I cut HATE into my stomach.


   
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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 9th 2011, 11:09 AM

I remember quiet a few of them, I can tell you the time day and what was going on. I hate it sometimes




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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 9th 2011, 01:42 PM

I tend to remember the ones that are worse. Some of them are just so apparent that it's hard to not remember where it came from, or why I did it.


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May the bridges I burn light my way." - I, Alone - Otep

   
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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 9th 2011, 02:18 PM

I remember the worst ones. I carved Love into my arm when my boyfriend at the time started abusing me and my whole arm is ruined because of him and his abuse.
   
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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 9th 2011, 07:58 PM

Yeah. (Maybe this thread should be marked as triggering??) The only really noticeable scars I have are on my thighs. I did them when I felt amazingly guilty about doing something, which involved two people, and ironically they're the last ones I did before I stopped, but sometimes I look at them and think if it wasn't for those two people they probably wouldn't be there.


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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 9th 2011, 09:09 PM

Yea, I remember them. I don't remember why I did them, but I remember exactly when I did each one. I can pretty much remember where and what I used to. I basically attempt to just not look at any of them (pretty difficult). But also, I try to remind myself that I am not in that place anymore, and they don't have to define me.


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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 10th 2011, 02:52 AM

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Originally Posted by bitesize View Post
Yeah. (Maybe this thread should be marked as triggering??)
I agree that it should be marked as triggering.
   
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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 12th 2011, 02:28 AM

I have several scars that I remember exactly why I did them and it always brings me back which is hard.But now I look at them and I try to think of it more as yes I did go through that and it was difficult but time has passed and now it's in the past.


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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 12th 2011, 03:21 PM

I know exactly whatcha mean :/ like certain scars on my thighs and hips remind me of why I relapsed... But I mean I hate looking at them because it hurts to think about it. But their life lessons just think of them as you overcoming a difficult time in your life.
   
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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 14th 2011, 05:08 AM

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Originally Posted by lashelle95 View Post
I know exactly whatcha mean :/ like certain scars on my thighs and hips remind me of why I relapsed... But I mean I hate looking at them because it hurts to think about it. But their life lessons just think of them as you overcoming a difficult time in your life.
Right on! Agree completely!


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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 14th 2011, 08:51 AM

Hey there,

Well when you feel this way from seeing scars, you should firmly remind your self "THAT is in the past, do NOT dwell on it"

Quote:
know exactly whatcha mean :/ like certain scars on my thighs and hips remind me of why I relapsed... But I mean I hate looking at them because it hurts to think about it. But their life lessons just think of them as you overcoming a difficult time in your life
Think of it that way, you vut because you HAD these feelings, just because you see the scars, does not mean these feelings need to come back xx

Stay Strong, and PM if you need to




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Re: Certain scars remind you of the feelings/moments/reasons why you cut? - September 17th 2011, 05:24 AM

i only remember 2 times of cutting for a reason. one time when i cut the word fat into my stomach, i remember i had just had a huge binge after already eating a lot that day. i cut the word worthless into my stomach too, and thats the other i remember. it was after a whole day of being yelled at and mocked, and then i went online and was called worthless for no real reason other then its true i guess. so yeahhh thats how i got those scars.
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