It's coming closer...

[EIL]

I can't belive a person's life could be so bad. And I know that each thing is only small, but it all adds up into one big black cloud. I've never cut before, but there have been times when I've nearly done it, and something has always stopped me. I guess at the moment I'm too scared, but it feels like the sea coming in, like it's almost high tide...

[Palmolive]

Hi there Eil.

It sounds like your struggling quite a bit right now and I was wondering how you're really feeling. Do you think you can open up to us about how you are feeling? It might help you.

Firstly I think it's great that you've not self harmed in the past even though you have had thoughts of doing it. Something is holding you back and that's what you have to keep holding on too because self harming is not worth it. I don't want you to start hurting yourself and get caught in to this addiction people often find themselves in with self harm.

Do you have any one to talk to? I am thinking it would be a good idea to open up to someone about how you are feeling and your thoughts about hurting yourself sooner than later before it is to late and you start hurting yourself (which hopefully won't happen). You can talk to people such as family, friends, doctors, school nurse/counselors, teachers or even a helpline. All of this people care about YOU and can help you beat this with out you having to hurt yourself.

I know it's hard but keep on fighting the thoughts when you do have them because you're worth more than it.

Jessie

[Le bonheur*]

Jessie said everything that I wanted to say but I want to add that you're not alone. There are so many people here on TeenHelp who will help you through this and I am one of them. I am only a PM away if you ever would like to talk about what's causing these feelings or if you would like to just talk about anything to get your mind off of these thoughts. Self-harm is highly addictive and I commend you on not giving into your first thoughts of them and looking for help before you started. And I'll repeat something Jessie said and say to talk to someone such as a counselour or teacher or any other trusted adult (or a friend).. it can really be helpful to express your feelings rather than keep it in. Take care of yourself, you're worth more than this. <3

B.

[EIL]

I've tried talking to my cat and it does help a little. Even though she doesn't understand, it still works...