I've hurt myself for a while now...

[Caramel Cheesecake]

Thinking back, I always did something painful to cope with stress. When I was younger (ten or eleven, I think) when I was upset of angry, I'd bend my thumbs back hard enough to hurt, and then I'd calm down. I don't bend my thumbs back anymore, but...it's just gotten more extreme. I don't cut myself, but I use a pin to dig under my skin (not enough to bleed, but enough to sting) when I'm angry or scared or crying, because it makes me feel better. I just...I want to figure out a way to cope that doesn't involve hurting myself, but I can't talk to anybody, because I'm Muslim and self-harm is a sin, and nobody will actually be compassionate. They'll just judge me, and that stresses me out even more. I'm going to university (hopefully) in two years, and where I want to go has a counselor, so I can talk to them when I get there but for now, I was just hoping for support. For at least one person to say that I'm worth more than everybody treats me around here.

[Aintzane411]

Hey there.

First off, have you checked out the Alternatives to Self Harm that they have here. I have to admit, they have some pretty good techniques listed there. There's no way to see what will/won't work unless you try it.

Second, maybe there's someone outside of your religion that you could find to talk to. Perhaps a school counselor or a teacher. It may seem a little scary to think about telling people, but you sound genuinely concerned, and that's good. I'm glad that you're starting to ask for help now instead of letting your harmful coping methods go further than just a pin.

I'd say start with looking at the alternatives and finding someone to talk to. Remember, there are plenty of us here on TeenHelp who are more than willing to answer questions or to just be there to talk. Feel free to message me any time if you just want someone to talk to. I'm a recovering self-harmer, so I may be able to help with problems or issues you may be having. Stay strong. <3