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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Told my friend... - December 17th 2011, 01:07 AM

A few days ago, I told one of my best friends about having self-harmed before. She knew I was depressed, and in the past I had mentioned wanting to do so before although I never did. Then a few months ago, I gave in to the temptation and have been tempted even more since. Luckily it is not a habit yet, as I have only hurt myself a few times. My friend seemed a bit surprised and hurt when hearing about what I had done (I only scratched; haven't done anything else yet) but she reactted pretty calmly. This morning I think I told her too much though...A few nights ago I scratched worse than before, almost to the point where I drew blood. After I told my friend about this this morning, she seemed worried and didn't say anything. I asked her if she was mad at me and she said she didn't know which is really making me worried. I think I went too far, and I don't know what to do about it. I can understand why she'd feel upset by that because I had a friend tell me about hurting herself before I even wanted to. Does anyone have any advice on what I could say to her? She understands self-harm about as much as someone who has never done so can. Also, she is not the first person I have told about hurting myself. Thank you in advance.


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Re: Told my friend... - December 17th 2011, 01:41 AM

Hi,
I think it is great you told your friend and that she reacted calmly.
I understand the her not knowing if she is mad/worried thing.
I can tell you that I had a friend, a very long while ago, that told me she SH'd, this shocked me and I was angry/worried/confused as to whether or not to tell and those are all thoughts that could be running through your friends mind.
She could be trying to decide if she should tell someone about your SH, if she should just be there for you and not tell anyone, or if she should suggest you tell someone.
Sense she reacted calmly, as you stated, you could ask her what she is thinking about what you told her and see what she said. Knowing what she thinks about you telling her about your SH can help you feel better because than, if she has any ideas as to how to get you help, you might be in a good position to get help so that your cutting does not become an addiction.
I hope I have helped and if you ever need anything, you can PM me and I will be glad to help.


"i don't care your intentions. I just want you to know my self-hatred never took me where I wanted to go. At the end of the day...I can pick at the pain but I can't cut it away."
   
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Re: Told my friend... - December 17th 2011, 01:42 AM

I would say to just give her a little time. When you figure out someone you care about is SHing, it's going to affect you. The same thing happened to me a few months ago when I told my best friend. She's most likely just worried about you and trying to figure out what she can do to help you or support you. If you want to talk, you can PM me anytime.
   
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Re: Told my friend... - December 17th 2011, 02:01 AM

Thanks for the responses. I actually AM worried that my friend might be considering telling someone about self-harming even though I assured her that it's not that bad since I haven't cut or anything. But that might just be me being paranoid which happens when I can't figure out people's thoughts on one of my actions. I really don't want her to tell anyone. My parents dont' know I'm depressed or have self-harmed and I don't want them too. Especially since money is tight and we can't afford to waste money on something only I can truly overcome. I'm just so scared. I want to keep quiet about it for a few days since that is probably best but I'm really freaking out.


"Just open your eyes and see that life is beautiful..." ~Sixx:A.M.
   
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