Randomly triggered? Huh?

[Max_99]

Alrighty, well, about two days ago I finally got the courage up, looked at the last razor I owned, and called up my boyfriend. I asked him to come over, told him I had to give him something very important. He came over and drove across town within five minutes. After a hug, small talk, I finally got up the courage yet again and when he went to hug me again, I said "Wait...you don't want to do that.." "..Wait...what?" I then pulled the razor out of my pocket and put it in his hand. He had the most confused look on his face, but he looked at me concerned and asked what was wrong. I told him that I never wanted to cut again, that I wanted to exchange that old comfort of a razor for the comfort of him and his love. I told him I wanted him to destroy it, and to never let me find it again.


He did so, and I've been cut-free since about January 3rd. But I keep getting these random urges to cut, constantly and randomly. They've happened randomly while walking, thinking, sitting in class, making food, or watching TV and they persist until I somehow satisfy the need, whether it be rubbing the spot I want to cut, holding ice, or scratching where I want to cut.



If anyone can help me understand why these random urges happen and how to control them, get over them, that'd be wonderful.

[Amberpamber]

I too get random urges to SH after stopping. You get used to doing it so it because part of your life. http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f12-s...ves-self-harm/ is a great link to go to find ways to keep from SH when you have the urge too.

[Childish Giggle]

Hey there,
Well, Self Harm is an addiction. If you think of the urges like this, say smoking is an addiction to nicotine. Once they get addicted then they have to do it, it gets difficult for them to go without nicotine. So they smoke for no reason sometimes. That is how I describe the urges that we get to cut. I hope that made sense. Once we experience cutting, then for some time whenever anything goes wrong, we want to get that feeling of comfort that cutting used to give. Its perfectly normal to feel that way.
Its awesome you did that, give the razor to your boyfriend. It takes a lot of courage to do something like that. Not many people will be able to do it.
And also, it is human nature to want to do what they are told not to do. Like if someone takes away lets say, our ipod. We'll suddenly want to listen to songs.
I think getting over this will take time. Like getting over any addiction takes time. But whats good is that you have taken a BIG step towards stopping it.
Stay strong <3 PM me anytime you want

[Max_99]

Thanks everyone I talked to my therapist about it as well who agreed.