Refusing to cut then scratching

[InvisibleChica]

When I get really upset or angry I cut. Last time I did it, I made quite a few and they were quite noticeable, I made up excuses to everyone but it made me feel really bad for doing it. So the next time I was really upset, I made it worse by fighting myself to not cut. In the end, I scratched up my arm with my nails. I don't really know if it was on purpose or what but I still got into the skin and left marks so it wasn't much of a progression away from cutting. I'm just not sure how to stop it, I bottle up emotions until I pretty much explode and have little self control. My parents know I struggle with it but they don't know about the cutting. My doctor has suggested therapist or something to my parents but they probably wouldn't be much help because I am so quiet and shy, there would be no way I'd be able to tell a stranger face-to-face about any of this, it's hard enough right now :/ can anyone help me stop this? I don't want to do it, it's stupid. I should be able to control myself.

[Childish Giggle]

Hey there
Firstly, Welcome to TeenHelp. If you need anything around here feel free to ask!
Bottling up emotions is a very unhealthy habit. If you keep doing that for a long time, you just explode and cut. I'd suggest that stop bottling them up. You need to find a way to let them out. Try writing down your feelings. Or sharing them with someone if possible. It keeps you from exploding.
I am glad that you tried not to cut. Next time when you need to keep your hands busy when you feel like it, try doing something from this list of alternatives. You may have to try a number of alternatives to find one that works for you.
As for seeing a therapist and talking face-to-face I totally understand where you come from. It is something I am struggling with right now. But you need to take small steps towards it. Joining this site and creating this thread was one. You'll get there eventually. Just take one step at a time. If you are not comfortable talking and telling face-to-face you can start with writing and handing it over to the therapist. It may not work as good as talking, but it is a start. As is getting help. being a shy or quiet person doesn't mean that you can't do it. You'll take some time to be comfortable talking to the therapist, just like we all take time to be comfortable around anyone, friends, colleagues when we first meet them.
For a start, try to open up, release the emotions. Writing is one of the best methods to do this. It may not work for you. But you won't know till you try. And it is a step.
Stay strong <3. PM(Private Message)/VM(Visitor Message) me anytime if you want someone to talk to

[Alexis Marie]

i do the same thing except when i have a blade i will use it. i know how you feel it is like the same as cutting but to me i decided to work with one thing at a time so maybe try to stop cutting then try and stop scratching and keep yourself busy that way you don't have to stop cold turkey

[InvisibleChica]

Thanks to both of you After posting on here I did actually feel so much better. Same when I saw your replies, thank you

[Childish Giggle]

Originally Posted by InvisibleChica

Thanks to both of you After posting on here I did actually feel so much better. Same when I saw your replies, thank you

I am glad Feel free to PM/VM me anytime