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gymnastxxLeah Offline
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not addicted ? so confusing - February 23rd 2012, 12:29 AM

hi .

so i've been struggling with this thing i guess Its sorta like an eating disorder... anyway... i self harm.. a lot. its all part of the cycle.. binge, excercise, starve, and cut. cut . cut . cut . i kinda use it as punishment. anyway something i've noticed is that... i dont feel addicted to it. i can go days without cutting i really can and it doesnt really effect me much. i dont know.. its weird . i dont feel like i HAVE to cut i feel like i need to because i deserve it. Its weird . i want to cut. i dont want to stop. i guess i'm jist not addicted to this.

also, you know how people say one cigarette can get you hooked? well i've had three before and never got hooked on it. never addicted. is this just me or what?

I wanna fly. So I do gymnastics instead.

I'll just keep holding on to what i believe and oh I believe in you. Give me the strength for the fight and the heart to believe cause I've got to believe in you. I feel so alive.

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lauri Offline
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Re: not addicted ? so confusing - February 23rd 2012, 02:03 AM

Just because you go days with out cutting does not mean your not addicted the fact your still cutting means your addicted regardless if you dont do it every day. I dont cut every day. Thats why most people cut because they feel they need to to relieve anxiety because there really upset and so on. You can look into the alternativve thread to give you things to do instead of cutting. Like put ice where you want to cut instead, draw, run, pull a band aide off and on skin. Just because somethings addictive doesnt mean every ones going to get addicted to it. Some people may others may not.

Look for professional if you dont already have one so they can help you because starveing your self is not good and this cyle doesnt seem healthy. Best of luck. Hang in there.
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Solivagant Offline
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Re: not addicted ? so confusing - February 28th 2012, 10:33 AM

i want to cut. i dont want to stop.
Yes, you are addicted. I totally agree with everything Lauri said.
Try to use these alternatives when you have the urge to cut. Every alternative may not work for you, but don't be disheartened when one doesn't work, try more alternatives till you find the one that works.
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