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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Unhappy 1 week without but i want to again - April 9th 2012, 12:16 AM

I've gone 8 days without cutting and the cuts from before are healing but i really want to cut again and just knowing i could easily get a blade and cut dominates my thoughts. I dunno what to do im scarred im gonna go mad on my wrists again
   
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Re: 1 week without but i want to again - April 9th 2012, 04:56 AM

Hey there.
I know how you're feeling. I've been in the same boat many times. I'm very proud of you for making eight days. That is a great start. I know you can go longer. The thoughts can get intense, but if you try distracting yourself that can work wonders sometimes. Check out the alternatives to self harm thread in the SH forum at the top. Keep trying them until one works for you. You're worth more than the pain caused by the cuts. I can promise you that. Stay strong! You can do it. I'm here for you if you ever want to PM me.
   
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Re: 1 week without but i want to again - April 9th 2012, 02:00 PM

Hey there,

It's only been 8 days. While that is a HUGE achievement while you're struggling so hard, it is understandable for you to still be struggling. But how will hurting yourself help when you're already hurting so much? Where will it actually get you do? It will dominate your thoughts. Damn, self harm dominated my thoughts when I'd been three whole months without it! Recovery is about finding methods of handling the destructive thoughts and actions.
How about you try some distractions and alternatives for the moment. Try doing something with your hands if the thoughts are intense, like colouring or tearing up paper. Or try watching tv, being around friends or family, or going for a walk to clear your mind. Even just telling yourself that you'll wait five minutes and see how you feel, then wait another five minutes until you make it up to an hour. Take it in baby steps. :]

You can do this.
   
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Re: 1 week without but i want to again - April 9th 2012, 09:01 PM

Hi there

Going a week without self harming is honestly incredible and it's something you need to be proud of. Recovery is hard but if it was easy, you wouldn't learn anything from it. Just think, you've gone eight days with out self harming, so if you've manage to beat this for that long, you can keep on doing so. You can get to 9 days, 10 days, 11 days and so on.

Ultimately, as hard as it is, you're in control. The urges don't control you, you control them so therefore, you're the only one who can stop yourself from hurting you. And now that's not easy because at times you are going to feel really low or sad and have urges like there is no tomorrow, but if you work hard, stay determined and use distractions and have support there, you can beat them and get through it. Sometimes it might mean you run for miles, have a friends marathon or draw until you're out of paper. Other times it might mean you're crying until you're so tired, you fall asleep. But you can beat this and while it might not be pleasant, you can over come it and get through the moments of urges.

I really want too encourage you to take a look at the list of alternatives that Bibliophile has previously sent you the link too. While not everything is going to work for you, there will be distractions that do so it's all about trial and error and not giving up on everything, when you come across something which you don't find helpful. Keep on trying things, don't give up. It might be good for you to keep a list of all the ones which you find really helpful so when you're in that moment of wanting to hurt yourself, you can turn to that list and use something you know that helps. I know something I sometimes find helpful which I learnt while I was in hospital, is to snap a glow band. Now on average, these glow for 8-10 hours and you're not allowed to hurt yourself while it is still glowing, by which time the urges will have hopefully gone. You can try something like that too.

I hope this helps a little. I know this is hard but you can beat this. You may feel self harming helps in the moment, but it's not going to solve what's causing you to feel the need to hurt yourself so it's not really going to work. Talk to people too. If you're feeling low, upset or have urges, don't make yourself be on your own. You can do this so keep fighting and believe in yourself.

Take good care,
Jessie


"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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