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musicgirl6 Offline
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Name: Lindsey
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mild aspergers - April 15th 2013, 05:02 PM

hi! I have mild aspergers. some people don't know that I have it but sometimes it's obvious. I get really shy around people. I know it isn't a bad thing. I understand what I have but sometimes it's gets hard. like I feel different than alot of other people. does anyone else has aspergers?how do you cope with it?
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Re: mild aspergers - April 15th 2013, 08:55 PM

Hey Lindsey,

Welcome to TH!
I do not have Aspergers however I do have a friend that does and I'm sure their are probably people that will reply to this thread that can relate and share their stories and how they cope.
I'm not sure if your area has this, but if you can, maybe join a support group for other teens with Aspergers or similar disabilities. Being able to connect with other people that can relate to you and that are going through similar experiences can really help. Also, you could learn some great ways to cope from other people in the group.
Another thing, if you are seeing a counselor or therapist, they can recommend a lot of really great coping mechanisms that can help you and they may even know of support groups.
Hopefully this has been helpful and that you are finding your way around the site okay. If you ever need anything, you can PM/VM me and I will be glad to help!
Take care.

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Re: mild aspergers - April 16th 2013, 12:14 AM

Hi there

I'm almost fifteen and I have Asperger's. I am very shy around people, to the point of not leaving the house.

While I was in public school, I had a 504 plan (It's like an IEP) and it goes over what concepts and extra help you'll need in school. That was really helpful because the teacher's understood that I was having trouble and they were always willing to help me. It takes a while to get a plan in place, and you need a statement verifying that you have Asperger's. But I highly recommend this.

I am currently in support groups to talk to other people going through the same thing. Individual therapy is also very helpful. Your therapist can give you techniques to help you develop more socially.

I also want you to remember that you're a person, just like everyone else. We don't go around and say, "Hi, I'm autistic." We go around and say, "Hi, I'm ____(given name)" We are people who happen to have a disability. And we can help each other learn to live with it

Since you're having trouble socially, the best thing I can tell you to do is to get out there! If you get out somewhere a little each day, it won't be as nerve-wracking. Sometimes I'll even go up to people on impulse and just start a conversation.

I wish the best of luck to you

You can PM or VM me anytime

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Re: mild aspergers - April 17th 2013, 07:31 PM

I don't know if I do or if I don't. I'm diagnosed, but I exaggerated my "condition" on the day to get a free high-spec PC, monitor, printer, scanner, allowance, lots of software, new voice recorder, etc.

My upbringing certainly made me a lot what I am today. That's why I'm not sure if I have asperger's or not. I tend to be introvert, mind my own, but believe I know when to stand up for myself or even someone else if something isn't right. I have what some have described as a "pathological problem with authority", but that could be for several reasons. One, aspergers. Two,... feeling let down by "authority" in the first place. It makes me question authority a lot. I don't take orders easily just by "default". If it's a job contract I'm signing, I understand... but sometimes there are these subliminal unspoken agreements/rules between people, a sort of "code of conduct" which varies across cultures. Like "respect your elders". It doesn't fly with me. I would ask then "why respect elders" and have never gotten a satisfactory response. The answer I used to get was "because you just do". It's like in the 15th century someone asking why does gravity pull falling objects to the ground: "because God designed it that way". Strictly speaking, the correct answer should have been just "I don't know". I prefer to respect people on the basis of their character, and although age is correlated with maturity, it doesn't have anything to do with someone being a "nice" person or not... and I'm not going to respect and encourage someone who behaves like a jerk, regardless of age.

I'm generally speaking distrustful. I don't take people's word to be true. I don't really let people close to me easily, because I've been fucked with enough times and think I know better by now. Also, I've come to think with time that I don't have a very positive effect on people in the long term, and I don't want the bad conscience.

And I often feel alone. But that's because I've travelled a lot, never had a very "settled" life, and never really adapted to one environment. But asperger's could also be a cause. Socially I had big ups and downs. More often downs than ups.

I also have the "symptom" of heightened sensual perception. My hearing is noticeably better than most people. Vision too. And to some extent smell. I have an odd response to temperatures and pain. I can punch a wall reasonably hard without it really hurting (or doing me damage). It may be asperger's... it also may be to do with my musical training (hearing), and a lot of time I spent teaching myself martial arts (to be able to stand my ground that way, if needed). To a certain extent, I've taught myself how to ignore pain. I've often made a concious effort when walking the streets to improve my peripheral vision, to know what's going on around me just by habit, without turning my head all the time.

I used to be perhaps shy, in some ways, although people from my old school would probably say that often I was pretty damn loud (I didn't take people's shit quietly). I've worked on this overtime. Various successes I've had, and failures which I've learned from have given me a thick skin to a lot of people's shit, and given me a tinge of arrogance even, although it's subtle. It's in my attitude. I don't need a loud mouth to convey a message. Body language is often enough to tell someone that I don't care how much they bark and hate.

There are just too many variables. I certainly have traits stronger than most people. They improve or worsen depending on my environment, and most of all, depending on what sort of people I'm dealing with. I've been getting better recently, probably because I changed locations from more hostile to less hostile. I don't live in London anymore, where you can't walk most of the streets on Friday night without some group of 15 year old "gangsters" throwing bottles at you or trying to mug you.

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Then politics doesn't care about you either. Truth. You've got to make your voice heard, if you want to be listened to. But that's too logical for some people, so let me go a step further. Not making your voice heard, leaves other people free to hijack it by speaking on your behalf, even if they don't actually give a shit about you. That's politics. So, make your voice heard. That's not a quote from anywhere. That's just me.

Last edited by BDF; April 17th 2013 at 08:02 PM.
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