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Addictive Behaviours Discuss and receive support for addictions not related to substance use, such as gambling, Internet, sex or work addictions, in this forum.

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laceyXturrin Offline
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addicted to having men i shouldnt have - July 23rd 2012, 03:48 AM

Ok, I have this problem with going after guys I shouldn't have. I am 18, in a longterm relationship. I've had trouble with sex addiction in the past and now it's back, but way worse.
I've been with guys that I shouldn't.
Please don't judge me, It's not something I am proud of. I just need someone to talk to about it.

I've been having sex with my ex girlfriend's dad (I used to be bi)
It's messed up, but I enjoy knowing I have him in that way.

Could anyone help me by explaining why I do this?
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Wildflower2009 Offline
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Re: addicted to having men i shouldnt have - July 23rd 2012, 04:41 AM

The only person that would be able to explain why you personally do it is a therapist, so I cant tell you why you do it, but we did discuss sex addiction in my psychology class and there were alot of possible reasons... comfort from having someone close to you, contol over another person or your life, a way to escape from problems and deal with stress, just to feel good... pretty much anything! My teacher actually compared it to alcohol addiction. Think of all the reasons why people become addicted to alcohol...
If its possible for you to talk to a therepist you should. They can help you figure out why you do it, and if you want to stop they can also help you with that.
I wish I could help more than that!

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Ambedo. Offline
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Re: addicted to having men i shouldnt have - July 24th 2012, 05:58 AM

First of all, rest assured that no one is here to judge you. We are all here to support you through this.

Now, the first thing that you need to do is cut off contact with your ex-girlfriends father. Let him know that you've re-assessed your behavior and that you are not comfortable with the direction things are going. If you feel he deserves an explanation, let him know that you are currently in a relationship and would like to start being faithful to your current partner. On top of that, let him know that you would like to start sticking to guys who are closer to your age. He may not take it well, but cutting off ties is the only way to solve this.

Since no one on TH is a professional, we cannot tell you what it is that causes you to go after men that you should not be with. As Whitney said, there are a variety of reasons and any of them could be the cause. If it's something that you are truly concerned about, you might want to consider speaking to a professional. They'll be able to help you get to the root of the situation and figure out exactly what it is that is sparking this behavior in you. They will also be able to give you the tools that you need to help you quit this behavior.

I hope this helped, even a little. Please feel free to message me if you need someone to talk to. Take care!

wanderlust consumed her;
foreign hearts & exotic minds compelled her.
she had a gypsy soul
and a vibrant heart for the unknown.
-d. marie
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