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Addictive Behaviours Discuss and receive support for addictions not related to substance use, such as gambling, Internet, sex or work addictions, in this forum.

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Jovial. Offline
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Help?! - September 2nd 2013, 07:19 PM

okay so I have some family members that have really gotten themselves into drugs and I'm not sure what to do. It's been talked about getting them help, but thy threaten to kill anyone that does that saying they will kill the co and themselves before getting treatment. And they have guns. I'm just scared. They used to be so different now they are supper high anxiety and think everyone and everything including the government is out to get them. Any suggestions?




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Re: Help?! - September 3rd 2013, 07:44 PM

Hi Trish, That sounds really hard for you. Have you tried sitting them down in a calm environment and try talking about how you feel? If you feel you can't tell them yourself, you could maybe write a letter explaining how you feel and leaving it where they'll find it. Or you could send them an email, text or phone them.
I'm always here if you want to talk, hope things get better for you.






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Re: Help?! - September 6th 2013, 08:22 PM

The thing about people that are that hooked on drugs is that they're not going to accept help. Whether the threats they make are meant to be carried out or not, it's clear that they don't want anything to do with the idea of getting help. Chances are, they're probably in denial about the fact that they even have a problem. You and I both know that treatment doesn't do anything if you don't want to be there. Anyone with a substance abuse problem, especially those with problems as serious as what you've described, need to come to terms with their addiction before treatment can be of any use to them.

I know they're family and I know you care about them, but your best bet right now is to distance yourself from them. I'm not saying that you need to shut them out completely. Just spend a little less time with them and talk with them a little less frequently. As long as all of you continue to stick around and allow them to get away with their drug use because of the threats they've made, you're enabling their behavior. So, remind them that you love them and will be more than happy to support them when they decide to get the help that they need. But, for now, you can't be as big of a part in their lives.

The point that I'm trying to make here is that people sometimes need to hit rock bottom before they realize that there is a need for them to reach out and get help. You know me. You know I struggled with substance abuse in the past. It wasn't until I lost a lot that I realized how much trouble I was really in. Those types of wake-up calls might sound risky, but they really do help.

You know where to find me if you need to talk about any of this. Please do take advantage of that. <3


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Re: Help?! - September 7th 2013, 07:12 PM

In NA there's a saying: you can't control the addict, you can't control the addiction. You should not feel responsible for them not being interested in recovery. An addict won't make a real change until they themselves decide they need to. It took me years to figure out i was slowly committing suicide and another year to get help like rehab and an NA home group. By this time my friends and girlfriend were dead and i had been arrested several times, i was a straight up junkie and garbage head. Everyone has a different place they'll arrive at before they get help. You can only hope and pray that it will be soon. And be there for them when they do.





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