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Addictive Behaviours Discuss and receive support for addictions not related to substance use, such as gambling, Internet, sex or work addictions, in this forum.

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DeeAnn_Angela Offline
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I don't know. - June 25th 2009, 01:06 AM

I'm not sure if this is the right place or anything but...well, it's kind of an addiction. I have recently come to terms with the fact that I'm a compulsive liar. I lie about stupid things, comstantly...it's a habit. I do it without thinking, usually they don't even make a big difference. Sometimes, when I do tell the truth I end up regretting it because a lie would have sounded better. And while you would think that it would be a good thing that I've realized it, I really wish that I could just go back to being in total denial. Not because I feel guilty but...because now I realize that I don't feel guilty. I don't feel bad about lying, even though I do it comstantly. In fact, I don't feel anything anymore--I'm just apathatic (sp?), but I'm such a great liar and actress that noone notices...heck, I managed to fool myself for years. I know that sounds dumb, but it's the God-honest truth...I know, ironic considering what I'm asking for advise about.

Anyway, I'm new to this place, so I don't know if I'm doing everything right but...I'm desperate. I have come (kind of) clean to my boyfriend, but...well, I don't think he really gets what I'm trying to tell him. Other than that, noone knows and I don't want anyone to know, but I really need help before I do something that screws up my life even more.
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Re: I don't know. - June 25th 2009, 02:01 AM

Hey, and welcome to TH.

As for your post, I think that when you are about to speak, think about what you are going to say. Judge, "is it worth lying about this?" before saying it. of course, there are some situations where a bending of the truth is necessary. But work on being honest, because if you are honest, then people will trust you more.


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Shannon Offline
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Re: I don't know. - June 26th 2009, 04:02 AM

I lie a fair amount, too. This is the worst thing to say on this site, but...maybe you're blowing it out of porportion? Like, I think a lot of us just kind of subconcsiouly lie about little things, like funny stories we tell, or things of that nature.

Next time you're about to lie, just try to make yourself stop and see if that works. Then keep trying that. If the problem persists, go talk to someone proffesional about it, maybe?
   
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Re: I don't know. - June 26th 2009, 04:51 AM

Hi Sophie. It's normal to feel this when you are a compulsive liar, and I think there are a lot of people who are able to relate to what you are dealing with here. Some people may not be aware of this, but lying can become very addicting. When you've gotten into the habit of lying, it becomes hard to stop, like any addiction would. The thing about compulsive lying is that it's not going to simply disappear within time, and it's not going to be easy to suddenly have no problem telling the truth every time you speak. You have admitted that you have a problem, which is actually a huge step in the whole process, which you should be proud of yourself for. Not many people who are compulsive liars are aware of the fact that they do in fact have a problem with lying. So coming to terms with this fact is definitely a huge step towards dealing with the problem. If lying is having an extreme impact on your life, I would definitely get in contact with a professional. Lying hurts a lot of the people around us, and if your problem is not dealt with it could cause a lot more problems for you in the future. I definitely think that counseling or therapy would be something to consider.

I understand that is is hard to tell people these things and admit to the people in your life that you need help with this. But the truth is that no one goes through life without having a problem like this that they need to deal with, and there is nothing wrong with admitting that you need a little extra help dealing with it. And it is a lot easier to tell someone than have them find out in a much more negative way if your problem with lying worsens. Talking to someone is really your best way to go, and while it might be hard, it's worth it if it's what can help you.

Feel free to PM me anytime. Best of luck





A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
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Re: I don't know. - July 9th 2009, 01:49 AM

So I told my parents....it was kind of weird, but...idk. I told them, anyway.
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