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JJones Offline
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I want to be better but how? - September 28th 2009, 02:49 AM

I want to be better. A better person, a happier person. But how? Why is it that I feel that I am not everything I could be? Is it me beating myself up? I dont know. Let me give you some background. Ive just been dumpted, Dumpted by a wondeful woman, who I will never forget. At the age of 22, it may sound a little strange for a guy to be wallowing in self pitty. Perhaps I should get out there, and as some would say 'grow a pair', but how? How do you BE confident? What is it that people do or say?

Simply. How do you be happy?
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Re: I want to be better but how? - September 28th 2009, 03:43 PM

You will be happy but it can just take time. You have just split up with your girlfriend and you must have all sorts going around your head at the moment. I suppose you just have to give yourself time and pamper yourself a bit and do things you enjoy. The thing with confidence is if you appear confident people will think you are. The same as if you act like you are not confident people will think that you are not. You have to act confident even if you don't feel it then people will think that you are. I know it is harder done than said. But it is true. It is easy to fall into self pity but I guess you have to learn to accept what has happened and move on. Obviously dwelling on it isn't helping and you are only feeling worse. So you have to try to let go and then you can begin to be happy. Stay strong
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Re: I want to be better but how? - September 28th 2009, 08:48 PM

be who u r in ur mind.
being a better person means all those lil everyday decsions.... and pausing before you take them. think, wat will the person i want to be do now?

every1 has it in them to be happy, every1 has it in themselves to shine.
nobody is better than you, nobody is worse than you. and if their actions speak otherwise- know that one day they may change to be the greatest kindest person.
wat im trying to point out is, watever happens, whomever u come across, dont be intimated, u have as much right being here as they.
that helps tons with ur confidence, keep ur chin held high, and know that watever happens, at the end of the day ur spirit will not be defeated.

it's all baby steps, jones, take one at a time. good luck.

if u need anything im right here!! adn hope i was a bit helpful!
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Re: I want to be better but how? - September 29th 2009, 09:09 PM


I'm sorry you're going through a rough time right now, but it does get easier. Seriously. Its really difficult to be confident as a person, especially if you're naturally shy. For me the best thing to do is to go out with some friends, get them to introduce you to new people and go from there, its easier to get to know new people if they're introduced to you by someone you already know as they can give you something to talk about etc. Confidence is all about the way you think and I'm sure somewhere inside you're a really confident person!

But I have to add that happiness isn't all about confidence and knowing loads of people. Try and spend time with the friends you already have and do the things that make you smile. In the long run I think this wil make you happier!
Good Luck!

You are the one, the one who lies next to me,
Whispers "hello, I missed you quite terribly"

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