TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives


You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
niente_ Offline
Ex band geek, but still proud.
I've been here a while
********
 
niente_'s Avatar
 
Name: Niente
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Location: UK

Posts: 1,214
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: January 9th 2009

I had this sudden thought ... - April 4th 2009, 08:46 PM

Marked as possibly triggering, but not sure.

When I was about 8 I had a best friend and me and her used to go round to each other's houses etc. We both went to the same comprehensive school but kind of losted touch, then she moved away and I've not seen or her from/about her since.

A couple of years ago I mentioned her in conversation with my mum. Then my mum told me that my friend had actually been sexually abused by a man who lived down her street at the time. My friend's mum had no idea but somehow found out, and was glad that I was a friend and helped take my friend's mine off it.

Then I just had a thought the other day about a game me and this girl used to play when we met up. We used to take it in turns to be the "victim". The other would "kidnap" the victim and tie them in a chair or on the bed, and say something like "I'm coming back verrrry soon." Then they would leave the room. They would then come back in the room as someone who was going to save the victim. They'd untie them and escape before the evil person came back. I definitly remember there being some sort of sexual feeling to it all. As if someone had kidnapped the victim and was planning to rape them.

I'm not sure exactly what my friend went through. But the thought suddenly occured to me the other day that maybe that's what she experienced, or something similar, and she was taught that it was a game, so naturally she taught it me too.

I dunno ... waddaya think?




Sometimes it's better to forget how you feel
and remember what you deserve


S. M ... still in my heart, forever
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Never Forget Hope
I can't get enough
*********
 
escape_thereal_world's Avatar
 
Name: Kelly
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Location: Charleston, SC

Posts: 3,097
Blog Entries: 98
Join Date: January 7th 2009

Re: I had this sudden thought ... - April 4th 2009, 10:45 PM

Wow, that kind of gave me chills. I bet that realization was a bit of shock to you for a bit, yeah? I'm sorry about your friend. That's horrible that she went through that. (sorry dont have much more to say atm)
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Through-Glass Offline
<3
I've been here a while
********
 
Through-Glass's Avatar
 
Name: Jessi
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Location: Eastern Tennessee

Posts: 1,323
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: January 7th 2009

Re: I had this sudden thought ... - April 4th 2009, 11:08 PM

Sammy,

It is very common for children who have been abused to incorporate this in their pretend-play, almost like reenacting the scenes. It is very possible that those games you used to play stemmed from things that really happened to her.

This must feel very strange. Try not to think about it too much; there was nothing wrong with these games. In fact, this type of play can be theraputic for child-victims; often, they are still too young to explain the things that happened to them. This is sometimes how they get it out of their system. It's great that she felt comfortable sharing these things with you, even if it was disguised as a game.

Take care, and if you need to talk, you know where to find me. =]


[/url]
"For the first time
in a long time,
I can say that I wanna try.
I feel helpless for the most part,
but I'm learning to open my eyes.
And the sad truth of the matter is,
I'll never get over it,
but I'm gonna try
to get better and overcome each moment
in my own way"

Motion City Soundtrack, "Even If It Kills Me"
  Send a message via Yahoo to Through-Glass  
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
soul Offline
Any fool can criticize
Senior TeenHelper
*******
 
soul's Avatar
 
Name: Mimi
Gender: Female

Posts: 922
Join Date: January 6th 2009

Re: I had this sudden thought ... - April 6th 2009, 04:29 PM

Hey Sammy,

I am sorry your friend had to go through this. I think you are right and that it is likely she was reenacting something that happened to her. However, her intentions were pure. She obviously didn't understand what the 'game' really meant. Children are like sponges and they absorb up everything that happens around them. The only problem is a lot of the time they can't process all the things they see or go through fully because they don't have to intelligence to do so. I know when I was little I would recite anything knew I learned to the very first person who would listen or play along. Your friend was simply spitting back out information. She might even have been trying to deal with something she didn't understand by pretending it was a game. While this might seem a little creepy try not to put to much thought into it. She meant no harm and thats what counts. Take care.

Lots of love <3 Mimi



As long as we can dream, there will be unicorns.
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
emilyjaynescott Offline
Member
Not a n00b
**
 
emilyjaynescott's Avatar
 
Name: Emily
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Location: Manchester

Posts: 77
Join Date: January 6th 2009

Re: I had this sudden thought ... - April 9th 2009, 07:58 PM

Hi,
Yes it is more than likely that your friend was taught that it was some sort of game, and the fact that she incorporated a "rescuer" into the situation could have been her playing out what she wished had happened.
However, at this stage, I'd suggest that you try not to think too much about it. Hopefully your friend is leading a better life now, away from all that. If you do wanna talk more though, feel free to pm me.


Time heals the wounds unhealable!

Feel free to talk to me if you ever need someone, I know how it can feel to be lost, to be found, to be disappointed and hurt. I also know that it can always get better!
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
sudden, thought

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.