TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives


You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
jodi322 Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
jodi322's Avatar
 
Name: Jodi McCann
Gender: Female
Location: Illinois, USA

Posts: 32
Join Date: May 7th 2012

My Friend and Her Stepdad - May 7th 2012, 08:39 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of rape or abuse, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Ok, so I want to say this before I go any further: I HAVE NO SOLID PROOF. THIS IS ONLY A CONCLUSION THAT MYSELF AND MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY THINK IS GOING ON.

Moving on, two of my friends from school have been dating for a while now. The guy's parents know all about their relationship but the girl's parents do not because they do not want her so much as hugging anyone not a family member. It has gotten to the point where whenever the boyfriend so much as gives her a sideways shoulder hug and the daughter's stepfather sees it, he runs out and calls the daughter a "slut," a "whore," and other names and says that she is going to get pregnant and that they will disown her. Now, I just want to say that they are a VERY innocent couple and have both vowed to stay virgins until they are married (hence, there is no way she would get preganant from said boyfriend).

Also knowing several other details such as how the stepfather treats the daughter, how he looks at her, etc., myself and several others have started suspecting that he harbors "unnatural" feelings towards his stepdaughter. We think he abuses his wife as well because of some other incidents.

My friend has not told us that anything has happened, but she appears to show many of the signs of someone who is sexually abused (I have seriously looked into this) but she refuses to tell anyone anything. We, her friends and family, all fear for her and her mother and eight year old sister but realize that there is very little that we can do if she herself refuses to relay anything. We also know that if anything is going on, then she could gat pregnant, have health issues, etc. What should we do? Are we only needlessly worrying? We are very scared for them if this is true!


Stay Strong.
Message me if you need to talk. I may not always have the best advice, but I'm always willing to listen.
Aim for the moon for if you fall, you will land amoungst the stars.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Tigerlily. Offline
Rawr
I can't get enough
*********
 
Tigerlily.'s Avatar
 
Name: Cheye
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Location: Nevada

Posts: 2,054
Blog Entries: 27
Join Date: August 22nd 2010

Re: My Friend and Her Stepdad - May 7th 2012, 12:13 PM

Hi there, this is a very tough situation to be in honestly. Not only for your friend but for you and the others who care about her. She may or may not be being sexually abused, but like you said, it can be definitive until she is the one to say something about it. With what you've said it is very possible, but sadly we really can't say one way or another unless she is the one saying what is going on. All that you can really do is be there for her, and try to help her but don't keep pushing it, or she may try to hide it even more assuming she's hiding anything at all. Just be there if and when she ever needs support or a shoulder to cry on, maybe bring it up once again, but wait a bit between when you bring it up, because if you just keep bringing it up, it may do more harm then help. Be gentle, be subtle, and only bring it up every so often if you feel the need to. You may be able to talk to a teacher or school counselor, but they may not be willing to do anything without solid proof, but possibly if you brought it up to like a school counselor they may look for the signs and bring it up to her, but even then, if she is being sexually abused, there's a chance she would lie to them about it too. You just have to be there for her, whether it's about this or not, be as best a friend as you can be, and that's all you really can do.


Resident old person, back from much needed, multiple year hiatus.


HelpLINK Mentor(1/28/11)Live Help Operator(5/28/11)Social Networking Team(2/9/12)Rape and Abuse Forum Moderator(2/11/12)Articles Team(7/17/12)Sex and Puberty Forum Moderator(7/28/12)Fashion and Style Forum Moderator(9/23/12)Chat Mod(10/13/12)Buddy(11/18/12)
  Send a message via MSN to Tigerlily. Send a message via Yahoo to Tigerlily. Send a message via Skype™ to Tigerlily. 
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
♥Bliz Offline
Frosted but not frozen
Junior TeenHelper
****
 
♥Bliz's Avatar
 
Name: Kyle
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Anywhere someone needs me ♥

Posts: 340
Join Date: March 4th 2009

Re: My Friend and Her Stepdad - May 11th 2012, 02:20 PM

well then, not easy... but it is up to her to say anything. I'm not sure how much deeper you can go into this, but just be there for her, and make her feel as comfotable about anything and everything with you and her other friends. If she will tell anyone though, it may just be her boyfriend. Talk to him about your ideas, and see what he says. (if you havent already) She may very well be in danger... but you can't do anything on just thoughts that she is. Don't pressure her, but maybe someday she'll come out about it. I hope she does if so... but there's not much you can really do. Regardless, I hope all will be well!


If you ever need it, I'm here to help, talk, or whatever! ~~Kyle
Suicide helplines:
1-800-SUICIDE (784-2433) or 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
  Send a message via Yahoo to ♥Bliz  
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
friend, stepdad

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.