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DomoKay Offline
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Seeing stalker - April 9th 2016, 05:19 PM

In 2013 I was forced by my college hall director to get a no-contact order through my university's student conduct department on a guy who was my friend and ended up finding my dorm, tricking me into opening the door, and locking himself inside my dorm. I was absolutely terrified that he would get angry at the order and would come to attack me again. He was obviously very mentally unstable, but I did not know until it was too late. We met through a political volunteer group, and worked really hard for it. I had to lose touch with the organization because he was so involved, and I wasn't willing to risk seeing him. This year I really want to get back into that activism volunteer group, but am afraid to because he may be helping run it. I really want to be able to work with the group but I don't even know if it is possible to be a leader within if I cannot communicate to him directly... What should I do??
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Re: Seeing stalker - April 10th 2016, 10:56 AM

Is it possible to find out if the guy is working within the group? You shouldn't have to give up things that you really want to do, out of fear, though at the same time, you also have to prioritise your safety. Could you talk to someone running the group about the dilemma you face? Or the college hall director even?

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Re: Seeing stalker - April 11th 2016, 07:08 PM

I agree with Holly. While you shouldn't have to give up things you're interested in, you have to keep yourself safe as well. I think you should try to figure out if this guy is leading the group. If he is, or you're too uncomfortable and do not want to join, maybe you can look into some other groups?

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Re: Seeing stalker - April 14th 2016, 04:07 AM

Hey there,

I think you need to try and figure out if he is still working for the group. If he is then I would suggest that you avoid getting involved again because it could do more harm then good.

I attended a church with my abusers at one point and was helping out the youth group. I thought I could handle it but I ended up being scared all the time and I had to resign from the position. I think that in the end you need to consider your safety above anything else.

If this group doesn't work out for you maybe there are some other groups that you could get involved in. I know that a lot of colleges have numerous groups and it is likely that you will end up finding another group that fits your wants and desires.

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